Baby's in Charge

Ok, so I had a baby 7 weeks ago today just in case you haven't heard that. Her name is Naomi. We went to our new ward for the first time yesterday and they had us introduce ourselves. While holding the baby I told everyone that we'd been married for six months. Nobody laughed at first, so Julie jumped up and clarified that we've been married for almost a year. I saw the confusion and shock disappear out of their eyes and they started laughing. Anyway, that's besides the point.

I won't go into the grisly details of having a baby. You all know about the crying and the pooping and the spit up and getting no sleep, etc. I swear though, my baby takes some sort of sick pleasure in throwing up right after her bath or after we put her in a new outfit. She only smiles after throwing up, so she knows she's not supposed to do it. I can't help but laugh after she looks so pleased with herself after vomiting on her new dress.

I've heard lots of people say their baby always cries when she's getting changed. Mine doesn't. She can be screaming when I put her on the ground, but as soon as I start changing she'll quiet down until I'm done changing her. It's the weirdest thing. Sometimes when she won't stop screaming i'll put her down where we change her diaper and it'll give me a minute or two of peace before she realizes she's been fooled. Then she screams with double the fury to make up for it.

I'm not sure where she came off thinking she's the boss. She won't listen to reason and she doesn't respond to threats. I've told her a number of times that I'm going to give her away or sell her or if she doesn't stop screaming I'll put her outside the door for a little while and if she's not good I won't let mommy feed her for two days. She just ignores me and makes me pick her up and hold her and rock her. I'm like a slave to the baby. She's cost me several online games of Starcraft because I had to rush to her aid.

I think she believes Julie when at 3 am she yells out "Baby I'm gonna kill you!" That scares me and the baby. When Julie reaches that point I know it's my turn to take care of the baby. Sometimes the baby convinces us to let her sleep on the big bed with us. It's nice when I wake up and roll over and the baby is right there and she smiles at me. It makes me smile until of course she throws up on my pillow. She'll glare at me all the time too. I'll do something stupid and she'll bring down her eyebrows and just stare me down till I hang my head in shame. I love my little baby.