Brazil? Nuts!

Things Julie Says

2012-01-30T07:02:00.000-08:00

Yesterday on the drive home from church I was thinking about some of the phrases Julie uses all the time. I'm going to share some with you.

I can't do this! - I hear this all the time in the middle of the night. It's usually accompanied by tears because Julie's very tired and the baby won't go to sleep. I hear it a lot during the day too, but it's in an angry voice instead of a sad voice.

I need help! - This is probably Julie's most common phrase. If the baby spits up then "I need help!" If Naomi won't behave then "I need help!" If Julie wants to get up off the couch then "I need help!"

Damn it! - This is Julie's go to phrase. Whenever she's mad or upset or frustrated or mildly annoyed or thirsty this is what I hear. Julie said yesterday that with each child her swearing gets progressively worse. I won't tell you some of the other words she says...

I just wanna BE with you! - I hear this whenever I've found a moment to relax. Then suddenly it's snuggle time. However, this is often a trap to get me to go to bed.

When you're done that... - Julie doesn't use the word with. She also omits the word of as in "on top that".

Quick! Look at (Naomi/Aleta) - Whenever my attention is focused intently on something Julie feels the need to interrupt me so I can see the baby smile. I've seen the baby smile a hundred times, but I better look right now!

Can you help me do (any variety of things) - This would be fine except she's usually asking for help with a one person job. So "can you help me" is code for "can you do this?" It usually has something to do with changing a diaper or cleaning something.

That's enough for now. She says lots of positive things too, but they're not as fun to talk about.

Awkward Moments

2012-01-09T08:36:00.000-08:00

I don't usually feel embarrassed or awkward or any of those silly emotions. Sometimes I do feel a little uncomfortable with the moment. I'm going to share a few of those moments. These happen to everybody at one point or another.

1. Eye contact with the person in the car in the lane next to you at a red light. You weren't really looking at them and they weren't really looking at you, but you happened to look in each others' direction at the same time. What do you do?

2. Eye contact with the person in the bathroom stall. You were just looking for an empty stall, but you looked at each other while they were doing their business. And the only empty stall is the one right next to them. That's gonna be a tense couple minutes.

3. Eye contact with the guy at the urinal next to you. This one is a lot like the previous one although this one doesn't happen to girls. It's worse if after the eye contact the guy smiles at you.

4. Eye contact with the only other person in the elevator. Now you have to finish the ride feeling like you should say something, but you don't want to.

5. You and someone else both motion for the other to go first. This happens going into rooms or stairs or elevators. Someone has to go first. I usually go first.

6. You say goodbye to a casual acquaintance and then you both start walking the same way.

Several of these happened to me this morning before 10:00. Just one of those days.

Things not Done

2011-12-02T16:05:00.000-08:00

I've done a lot of things in life. I've gone places and seen things. There are a bunch of things I've never done that I wanted to do. I'm going to list some of them here. These are in no particular order. Just listed as I think of them. Some of these things I may do in the future. Some I won't. Some I can't for various reasons.

1. Trip to Europe. I'm not a fan of any particular country in Europe or even Europe in general. I'm a fan of the United States and like most Americans I think Europeans are a bunch of pansies. But Europe has a rich history and I'd like to visit and see all the cool stuff there.

2. Ski in Utah. I've heard Utah has some of the best skiing anywhere. I've gone skiing in Missouri on fake snow on a fake mountain. I always meant to go skiing in Utah, but it was expensive and you needed people to go with and to plan ahead and I just never got around to it. Closest thing to it was riding those lame tubes at Soldier's Hollow.

3. Scuba Diving. I have an ex girlfriend who used to scuba dive and it sounded pretty cool. It's also expensive, so I never did it.

4. Do a TV show. I think I could do well on smart shows like Are you Smarter than a 5th Grader. I could do well on competition shows like Survivor or The Amazing Race. If I got out of my lethargy and got in shape again I could do really well on physical shows like Wipeout. But you need extra time to do these things. I'm busy.

5. Make out with a girl with a tongue ring. I know, I know. You're thinking gross and trashy and stuff. Well, I was always curious how it would be. This is one I can't do now since I'm pretty sure Julie wouldn't approve of me finding out.

6. Get in a fight. The closest thing do a fight I ever had was with a kid in second grade who tackled me and I kicked him in the stomach and he walked away crying. I'd never start a fight, so I just have to wait for someone to mess with me. I'd rather start with a small, weak person and work my way up.

7. Join the army. I thought about it. A bunch of times. But I guess I didn't want someone telling me where to live and where to go. And living away from my family for long periods of time would suck.

8. Come up with a multi-million dollar idea or invention, sell it, and live like a king for the rest of my life. I'll keep working on that one.

Fall Semester

2011-08-27T19:55:00.000-07:00

School has started again and my period of hibernation has ended. It feels like I've been shocked awake with a bucket of ice water. I'm taking 18 credits this semester and there are no fluff classes. Here's the list of what I'm taking:

Physics 1220- Second half of algebra based physics
Ra_Sci 4303- Radiation Safety
Radiol 4328- Radiation Biology
NucMed 3255- Orientation to Clinical Practice
NucMed 3263- Morphologic Correlations in Nuclear Medicine
NucMed 4329- Radiopharmaceuticals in Nuclear Medicine

I don't care who you are, that list is nothing to sneeze at. Poor Julie is now almost six months pregnant and still working part time. Her due date happens to coincide with finals week as well. I also have to fill out a stack of paperwork the size of the dictionary for the Nuclear Medicine program. And I'm going to have to start wearing black scrubs everywhere.

It should be an exciting few months. My graduation date is now set for May 2013, so only 11 years after graduating from high school. I suppose people will say I should have finished a long time ago and all that, but what's life without a little adventure? Julie and Naomi and our new little girl don't need adventure though. They need some stability, so I guess I'll go ahead and finish school and get a real job. I understand Peter Pan though. I always wanna be a little boy and have fun. We all gotta grow up sometime.

Hibernation

2011-08-05T07:04:00.000-07:00

I finished school on the 28th of July. School doesn't start again until the 22nd of August. For the past week I've been sitting around the house doing nothing. I take naps, I play on the computer, I read books, I play with the baby. Julie and I rarely leave the house. I've also noticed that I've pretty much stopped eating. I'm back to eating about one meal a day. I believe I've reached the human equivalent of hibernation.

Nobody Cares

2011-06-03T10:25:00.001-07:00

I've come to a realization. Most people just plain don't care about what's going on in the world. Arab Spring? Natural disasters? Economy in the toilet? Nobody cares! If it's not affecting them right this second it doesn't matter. And even if it is affecting them it better not get in the way of Grey's Anatomy. Huge things are happening in the world, but the long and short of it is that people just don't care.

Not only do people not care, but they don't have any background knowledge about anything in the world. Ask any normal American where Iraq or Israel is on a map and they probably couldn't tell you. Where's the Amazon river? Who is Kim Jong Il? What countries made up the Axis powers in World War II? Guess what? Most Americans don't know. I'll bet they can tell you all about that silly royal wedding though. Or those Kardashian girls. America's Next Top Model, American Idol, that pregnant teen girl show. They are experts. I'm embarrassed to be human.

Practicality and Ethics (Part 2-Health Care)

2011-04-28T08:39:00.000-07:00

Health care has been a hot topic in the news for a long time now. What we have is an almost 2000 page bill that no one in the world could possibly comprehend in its entirety. I don't know what they were thinking when they put that together and passed it, but it needs to be scrapped and something simpler put in place. But what should be done in place of it?

2. Government Health Care
A. Ethics (Pros)- There are needs and there are wants in this life. Everyone can agree that health care is a need. The government and the more fortunate people have a duty to those less fortunate than themselves. Poor people need to be provided for. We have the means as a country to make sure everyone has their health taken care of.
B. Ethics (Cons)- Entitlement is ugly. Once someone believes they deserve something and that they are owed something then they have no desire to earn it or work for it. They'll get very angry if they aren't given exactly what they want when and how they want it. This creates a large body of lazy individuals just waiting for someone else to take care of them. Instead of helping people to get out of the rut they're in, the current system encourages and even rewards irresponsibility and laziness. These people have no gratitude for what they're receiving at the expense of others.
C. Practicality (Pros)- Our country doesn't need a bunch of sick people. Also, it looks bad when our lower classes aren't provided for. It ruins our image. Not to mention the lower classes make up a huge voting block. Take care of them and they'll take care of you.
D. Practicality (Cons)- I know I'm sounding like a broken record, but our country is broke. Government medical programs are one of the main reasons our country is in the red. Another one was addressed in the last post talking about our extravagant military spending with these endless wars. These individuals are sucking the coffers dry. Quite often they don't make any attempt to take care of themselves and then they need even more medical attention, but why should they care? It's free! Most of this lazy group of freeloaders is making no attempt whatsoever to change their situation. They're quite comfortable living off the government.

My personal opinions on health care are quite strong. I think any sort of entitlement program is a mistake. If you insist on having programs like Medicaid then they should take care of college students who are going to actually contribute back to society and get off Medicaid. And these programs should never ever cover anything non essential. The government should not pay for birth control. There's a free form of birth control called abstinence. There's another very cheap form of birth control called condoms. The government shouldn't be responsible for your poor choices.

A government option is also a mistake. Millions of Americans pay for their own health insurance. Why should they have to pay for everyone else's insurance too? It's not a "free government option". It's a tax paid government option. Also, no insurance should have to pay for something you did to yourself. You're 300 pounds and now you have diabetes? Well boo hoo, pay for it yourself. I can't tell you how many times diabetics came into the doctor's office while I worked there bringing in their huge 72 oz soda from the gas station and then laughing when we point out what they're doing like it's a big joke. We don't find it funny. But you don't care because your insurance is paid for by the government.

These programs have taken responsibility out of the hands of the individual. The only people who deserve aid are those who are actively trying to better themselves so they can become productive members of society. Insurance should handle emergencies and impossible to predict circumstances. I have a friend who has a child with undiagnosed special needs. That child should be covered by insurance and taken care of. It's not the mom's fault or the child's fault. It could not have been prevented or predicted. It just happened. But any disease or problem caused by your own decisions should not be covered by insurance.

The government should get its nose out of health care altogether. Let the private sector do what it does best. The beauty of a free market system is that someone will offer what people want because then they get business. Insurance can be great and so can health care. Private businesses can't compete with the government because the government doesn't play fair. And the government cheats. Look at everything the government has a hand in. You'll find inefficiency and bloated beauracracy everywhere you look. If private businesses ran things the way the government runs things they would all go out of business. That's just one of the reasons the government shouldn't be in this.

Practicality and Ethics (Part 1-Libya)

2011-04-27T21:09:00.000-07:00

I've given a lot of thought to what the United States has been up to lately. I don't like any of it. I don't like our national policies, I don't trust our leaders, and I'm ashamed of a large segment of the population. I'm going to leave our beloved representatives out of what I'm going to talk about. Those imbeciles are seven months late on coming up with a budget. If you acted that way in the private sector you would lose your job in a heartbeat. I think every single Congressman and Senator should be fired. Since I don't trust them to even wipe themselves properly I'm going to view the government as if I was in charge.

1. Involvement in Libya
A. Ethics (Pros)- These are fellow human beings who have requested our help. They are trying to create a new government where they won't be terrorized and mistreated. They're being slaughtered by a merciless, psychopathic dictator. Being in a position to help, it can be seen as our duty to step in do what we can to end the fight.
B. Ethics (Cons)- This is none of our business. The established government is putting down a bunch of insurrectionists. I don't know if we'll agree with what they want. Who are we to just barge into someone else's fight and try to make things turn out the way we want? There are a lot of other countries upset about this. How about they take care of it and leave us out of it. Besides, a lot of people don't want us over there and don't want our help. Maybe we should respect their wishes and let them take care of it. It's their country. Not ours. We are not the world's mom.
C. Practicality (Pros)- Gadhafi is a nut. Now is the perfect opportunity to support opposition. We can remove a self-proclaimed hater of America with barely any effort at all. No troops on the ground. Just a few well placed missiles. Libya also has oil. We happen to need oil. A friendly government selling us that oil would work out a whole lot better than Gadhafi. This will also give us a stronger foothold in a region that has been very unfriendly towards us. We've even been given permission by the Arab League. There couldn't be a better chance.
D. Practicality (Cons)- We are broke. We've already been bogged down in two very expensive conflicts for a decade. Our economy can't afford this fight. We've got a lot of problems at home that need our attention. Think of what that money could do for us. Instead we're shooting missiles at a country halfway around the world. The world already sees us as bullies and imperialists. Every time we take part in one of these conflicts that really doesn't concern us that view gets stronger in their eyes. Why give our enemies more to use against us? And who's to say the people we're replacing Gadhafi with won't be against us? Whoever is in charge will sell us oil. They have to. They need the money as much as we need the oil. It's better for us all around to do nothing.

Those are some of the arguments I've heard. I've expressed my own opinion rather strongly in a post I wrote not long ago, but to recap: Although I feel for the people of Libya who are trying to fight oppression my opinion, both ethically and practically, stands against any action in Libya. It's not our business. It's a civil war. Let them sort it out. We can't afford it and we don't belong there. We can't clean up the whole world's messes. We can't even clean up our own. Let's forget all this crap going on out there and concentrate on things at home.

I'll have to write a new post for the other stuff I want to talk about. This is getting really long already.

Old Games

2011-03-25T07:08:00.000-07:00

I've been on an old video game kick lately. You remember the old DOS system that used to come on computers? Well, I found a DOS emulator that works pretty well and I've downloaded several old games I used to play as a kid. I'm gonna discuss them here for you. I'd put pictures up, but as you can see from all my previous posts I don't know how to do that.

Castles II: One of the first games I ever played. You try and conquer France. It's like a primitive real-time strategy game. Turns out it's harder than I remember too. When we first started playing this game we didn't know you could speed it up, so we'd sit and stare at the little bars as every few seconds they'd move up a little.

Civilization: The original turn-based strategy game. Ancient graphics, but one of the best games I've ever played. It's still complicated enough to be difficult to do well. I spent countless hours on that game, but it wasn't until downloading it last month that I finally managed to beat it on the hardest difficulty.

Colonization and Master of Orion: Games very similar to civilization. Same basic idea, but each a lot of fun in their own right. I used to very much enjoy slaughtering the Aztecs and Incas for their money. Now I've got some peaceful thing going on. I like to build up strong cities and whatnot. Maybe I should download Sim City.

Xwing: I don't care what anyone says, Xwing is the greatest flight simulator ever made. It's fun, it's hard, and it's in the Star Wars world. They should make a new one with a multiplayer component.

I couldn't believe how well I remember the controls and hotkeys for these games. I felt like a man possessed playing xwing as my fingers just remembered what keys did what. And how did I remember on Master of Orion that Alt+M would make a 5x5 grid come up? I may have spent a lot of time on this stuff, but it was time well spent.

Libya

2011-03-04T07:17:00.000-08:00

Has everyone been watching the news lately? Tunisia and Egypt both had their governments toppled and a number of other countries are in unrest. Then we've got Libya. The screwball in charge doesn't want to give up. He's been in power for forty years and he's already in big trouble with the international community for the things he's done. The situation in Libya quickly degenerated from protests to a civil war. And all I'm seeing in the news is "Should the US step in to help?"

No! The US should not step in to help. This is not our fight. We've already got troops in Afghanistan and Iraq. I think we should pull out of both of those countries, but that's a seperate issue. The situation in Libya is none of our business. Not our people, not our allies, not our problem. Why does the US feel the need to get involved in every little dispute in the world? That's why everyone out there in the world hates us. Because we're always sticking our noses into everything.

Our country is broke. Our people are unemployed. Instead of spending billions of dollars on the rest of the world how about we spend that money here? We've got way too many of our own problems to keep dealing with everyone else's problems especially when they don't even want our help. And we seem pretty hypocritical to me. If the US wants to be involved in bringing down the corrupt leaders then why didn't we say anything when they were in power? We did nothing at all, but as soon as the people stand up for themselves we go "Hey yeah! You jerks in the government! How dare you! Step down!" What are we trying to do? Convince the people that we were on their side all along? Cause we weren't. It's all just political manuevering.

Here's what we should do about Libya. Watch. Make sure it doesn't spill over into something more than an internal conflict. Besides that I will repeat that the situation is none of our business. Let's get back to worrying about that ridiculous health bill or how the government is trying to screw over teachers. Let's fix the school policies that are getting kids criminal records for spitting spitwads. Let's worry about us and leave the Libyans to worry about Libya.

Forever Sick

2011-02-28T07:02:00.000-08:00

I've been sick for a full two weeks now. That doesn't happen to me. Let me tell you about my attempt to get ready for my Radiochemistry test. At Mizzou it's different from BYU (as I mentioned in a previous post). One of the big differences is that you take tests in class here. At BYU you usually had three days or so where you could choose exactly when to take your test and you had no time limit. You'd go to the big testing center and take your test at your leisure. It's not like that here. It's nice not having to find free time to take a test. It's nice knowing that the test is designed to take less than an hour.

There are some pretty negative points though. You have to take the test in less than an hour. No time for rethinking or going over your answers. Constantly checking the clock. And you better not be late for class. Do not oversleep. There is no flexibility. You show up in class on the specified day and you take that test or you just get a 0% and that's that.

Well, I don't have a problem with that except my test was Friday morning at 8 am and Thursday my sickness got about ten times worse. My fever jumped to 102.5. I was shaking uncontrollably and aching all over. I couldn't eat. I was vomiting. I couldn't think straight. I couldn't sit up without almost passing out. And all this was after being sick for a week and half already, so I was weak and tired and worn out. And I was supposed to take a test in 12 hours.

I emailed my professor telling him my situation. I never did hear back from him and I had a sneaky suspicion that he didn't really care if I was dead, but I better be there to take that test. He probably though I was making it up to get more study time. Luckily for me, sometime in the night my fever broke and I fell asleep. I woke up in the morning feeling like death with a wrung out feeling like I'd been put through the washing machine. But I managed to get to class with some prodding from Julie and I took that stupid test and I passed it. Barely.

And here I am on Monday. Still sick and doing a presentation in forty minutes. Papers, labs, observations, problem sets, and quizzes. I want one of three things. Let me drop over dead. Let me get better. Or let the heavens open and snow bury the university so it takes months to get classes going again.

Mizzou

2011-02-04T09:20:00.001-08:00

I haven't been a college student in a real university for almost two years. It's good to finally be back in school. I transfered this semester to the University of Missouri, commonly called Mizzou. There are some definite positive points:

1. They only accepted credits where I passed. All my failed classes and withdrawn classes are wiped away. Also, they just took the best grade if I took a class more than once. Overall, my transcript looks a lot better now.
2. I got in-state tuition, so it only costs double what BYU cost me. Not a bad deal.
3. They have a nuclear medicine program, so when I'm done with my undergrad, I'm done with school. No post grad work to get the same thing.
4. They have a pretty cool nuclear research reactor where I have my radiochemistry lab every week. Only a couple universities in the country have one of those.

After living in Provo forever there are some things to get used to back here in the wonderful state of Missouri. Allow me to list some:

1. The black people are actual African Americans. It felt like every black guy in Provo was from Kenya or somewhere else in Africa. It's nice to have real black people around again. I missed them.
2. Swearing. The teachers swear, the students swear, and it's no big deal. I haven't once heard the words "oh my heck", "flip", "snap", or "oh mylanta!"
3. References to beer, sex, porn, and drugs are rampant. Monday mornings it's a guarantee that people in class have a hangover. I walk from class to class smelling cigarette smoke.
4. There is a conspicuous lack of 19-21 year old boys in Provo. This is because most of them are out as missionaries. Also, it's not uncommon to have 26-28 year old guys still doing their undergrad. Most of the students here are 18-22 years old. I'm an old man here.
5. No one is married. They're young and their experiencing life outside of home for the first time and they've got other things to occupy their minds (refer to number 3 for those things). People see my ring and do a double take. Very uncommon.
6. No mountains, no desert, no Mormons. July 24th is not special. You don't go skiing. You don't conserve water. We got 18 inches of snow here on Tuesday. It's a very different scene from BYU.

Now, I liked BYU. It's a great school. I would have graduated happily from there if I had bothered to put any effort into it. I like the happy Mormons in their little bubble in the area they've affectionately named "Happy Valley". It's a good environment full of good people. That being said, I grew up in Missouri and it's my favorite state. And although I don't in any way participate, it's kind of nice to be back in the real world around all this screwy stuff that happens. It makes me remember why I'm glad to be a Mormon.

Anyway, Jacob at Mizzou signing off.

Glee

2010-09-22T13:48:00.000-07:00

My wife and I have watched Glee together. In fact, we've seen every single episode together. However, I've been liking it less and less as time goes on. Last night I was thinking about why that is. I think I've come up with some of the reasons.

1. It's another show where they have adults playing teenagers, but they're still being dirty adults. Kids don't act that way.

2. There is not a single likable person on the show. I will elaborate.
a. Rachel-obnoxious and self centered. There have been a couple episodes where she's had a "breakthrough" of some kind and stops acting that way for the rest of the episode, but then she's the exact same way in the next episode.
b. Finn - weak-willed, wishy washy, insecure. He's also had several breakthrough episodes where he gains confidence in what he's doing, but then he's back to being the insecure pansy boy.
c. Mercedes - her whole character is the loud, proud, black woman. Hello stereotype
d. Kurt - he's manipulative, he's a jerk, and he's mister in your face. If you don't support every stupid thing he wants to be or do then you must be an ignorant, intolerant, horrible person.
e. Puck - his character doesn't make sense. Either he should quit the club or he should use his tough guy status to shut the other people up.
f. Tina - she's just kind of there.
g. Mike - I'm not even sure if that's his name because his character is insignificant. He seems like a nice guy, but who knows?
h. Arty - He's kind of a jerk too. You'd think the disabled kid would be nice.
i. Quinn - She's another stereotype of a popular girl.
j. Santana - Just a mean slut. Another stereotype.
k. Brittany - Just a dumb slut. Again, stereotype.
l. Mr. Shuster - I liked him at first, but as time goes on I like him less and less
m. Figgins - crappy principal. Easily manipulated. Selfish
n. Sue - no one has the energy to be that big of a jerk. It's too hard.
o. Every single kid in the school is a big jerk. There's not one nice person who stands up for the people being picked on. There is no one to like.

3. Whoever is writing this show was obviously never on the football team. The football team supports each other. They wouldn't have given Finn crap like that. They'd have backed him because that's what teammates do. I don't know where this stereotype of jocks came from, but even where it's true they look out for their own. Our quarterback could have dressed as a woman every day and we all would have pounded anyone who dared say anything negative about him.

4. Progress is never made. Like I said before, characters all have these emotional and psychological breakthroughs, but then they act the same. Some of the coolest kids in the school join the club, but everyone still hates the club. They've grown and performed and yet the club is still in jeapordy of being canceled. Nothing has ever changed. On the same note, I think almost everyone associated with the club has a worse life at this point in the show than when the show started. It would have been better for all of them if they'd never joined up, and that includes the teacher.

That should be enough to go on for now. I could write more if I thought about it, but I'm not feeling well today. They are phenomenal singers and I enjoy listening to the songs. That's about the only redeeming quality the show has.

Holidays

2010-06-25T11:43:00.000-07:00

I've never been able to understand the big deal about holidays. There are a couple major holidays every year. Birthdays and Christmas. I don't consider anything else to be a big deal. I'm not gonna wear a shirt with a boat on it for Columbus Day. Mother's Day was only a big deal when I was a missionary and got to call home. Besides that you get a rose in church and everyone says Happy Mother's Day! Why do you need more than that? I didn't care about getting anything for Father's Day, but my wife made a big deal about it. Same with our anniversary. I think it's great we've been married a year. Let's have sex to celebrate and be done with it.

Maybe I'm just not very sentimental. I like how Julie makes a big deal about everything and gets all excited about every little day. She makes life fun. But I don't even think to do anything special for these days. For one thing, until a year ago I never had any reason to do anything special for Valentine's Day, July 25th, and June 9th. And I'd never do anything special for Mother's Day and Father's Day except for a quick call home.

Maybe Julie should just pick one holiday a year that she wants me to get all excited for. That way I can get her a big expensive gift and muster up the energy to be all chipper. I can't do that every two weeks. Yay for Boxer Day (Canada only), huzzah for Kwaanza! Labor Day rocks, presents for everyone on Memorial Day and Veteran's Day! Hanukka is the bomb! Black History Month is one big party! Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh! I can't do it.

How about we celebrate everything on Christmas and be happy with our lot in life? We can't afford all these ridiculous holidays anyway. I love my wife and my baby and I feel like every day with them is special. I show my affection in so many cost effective ways. My wife's birthday is coming up and she's getting a smile and a kiss. What more could a loving wife want?

End of the World Scenario

2010-06-16T18:59:00.001-07:00

Many of you know that I've always been fascinated by the end of the world. The whole apocolypse, end of days, destruction of the world thing. I've always been curious as to how it could come about. I don't buy into the whole asteroid, natural disaster, aliens, machines taking over, or whatever. I'm guessing it's all gonna be people bringing about our own annihilation. Here's a theory on how it could happen in the next few years:

President Obama is a power hungry man. He's just trying to extend the presidential power. I think he sees himself as the first American emperor. I've seen him belittle the Supreme Court justices and berate the Legislative branch for simply exercising their Constitutional powers. I could see our dear Mr. President being the very first American president to refuse to lay down power when he's been voted out of office. This could lead to the second American Civil War.

The United States has been the world's unofficial police force since the end of World War II. None of us know a world where the big dog isn't around ready to smack down any petty little tyrant who rears his head in an attempt at world domination. Saddam is the latest example of that. This has earned America the hatred of every extremist government, military organization, and religion. They've been trying to destroy us for years. If the US spiraled into a civil war our power to be the police of the world would disappear overnight. Every nutjob with a gun and delusion of grandeur would get the green light to try and conquer his neighbors.

Every single country in the Middle East would declare holy jihad on Israel. I have great respect for the Israeli military, but they'd be hard pressed to avoid extinction. North Korea would attack South Korea and probably Japan too. Maybe even invade Russia. Russia is a shadow of its former self. China would also invade Russia and all of its southern neighbors and anyone else they felt like conquering. Europe is full of little pansy nations who probably would just wet themselves and bury their heads in the ground. Africa has already nearly destroyed themselves. They'll keep at it.

That's all traditional warfare which alone would throw the world into utter chaos and cause death on a scale that the world has never seen, but don't forget everyone who has nuclear weapons. India would use them on China in self defense and probably shoot some at Pakistan. They'd both fire right back. Russia would go nuts and who knows where all their missing nukes are. Someone's gonna use them. The end of the world as we know it would occur and we'd be right where Christian cultist screwballs say we're going.

Anyway, that's one possibility. I told you not to vote for Obama.

Moving Away

2010-06-14T18:40:00.000-07:00

Well, as some of you know, my education history is quite a mess. When I started college I originally planned on medical school. It took a short time to realize two very important things. 1) I hate school. 2) When you hate school your grades start to suck. So medical school was no longer an option. I thought I'd do Physician's Assistant school after college just like Miles did. However, Miles himself convinced me not to do this. And since I'm now 26 years old with a wife and daughter I don't have time to finish my degree and start a post-graduate program.

Miles came to the rescue again and told me about becoming a radiology technician. I looked around and called the University of Missouri (Mizzou) and they have a nuclear medicine program. I'm done with all my general credits, so all I'd have to do is take the required courses and I'll be done. I wanted to go to Missouri anyway, so I figured I'd head out to Missouri next year and do this program.

My plans changed recently when I was fired from my job. I was quite shocked when I was told I was suspended pending an investigation. I later learned at the actual termination that it was because of a comment I made. Allow me to write the conversation I had with another staff.

Me: "The kids at this facility are way better than the kids at the Springville Campus. Those kids are incapable of making progress. As far as they're concerned they're never wrong and it's always someone else's fault. It's not them, it's the world. You can't talk to them, you can't process with them, and you just know that once they get out of there they're just gonna drain our tax dollars in prison. It would probably be easier if we just euthanized them. Ok, not really, but you see what I'm saying? At least our kids understand when they've screwed up."

The staff didn't say a word about what I had said, but it turns out that I was fired because of the word euthanize. I was lectured by the HR woman about how she doesn't even support euthanization for animals and it is not ok to say such a thing. I told her that I was joking and I didn't say it around the kids and I would have happily apologized had the staff told me they found it offensive. I bit my tongue on the other things I wanted to say about how I was a good staff for several years and had always received positive reviews from supervisors and they had requested me at this campus because of my record with dealing with these kids and that it's ridiculous to fire a proven staff over one flippant comment. I took my check and left.

Anyway, being suddenly unemployed I decided there was nothing left to hold me in Utah. I have only an online course that I can finish by the end of the month. So I decided it's time to head out. I've been in Utah for too long anyway. I should have graduated from BYU, but instead I got academic suspension. Something about doing very poorly for 3 semesters in a row. It's nice having a wife to motivate me now. I only wish I'd married her earlier. Can't change the past though, so it's off to salvage my education and get a decent job. Missouri, here we come!

Tolerance

2010-06-02T08:54:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking a little about the word tolerance. I was recently informed that I'm intolerant and ignorant because of my opposition to homosexuality. Let's review those words.

Tolerance: a fair, objective, and permissive attitude toward those whose opinions, practices, race, religion, nationality, etc., differ from one's own; freedom from bigotry.

Ignorant: lacking in knowledge or training; unlearned

Now, allow me to elaborate on my opinion of the said subject. I believe, and always have believed, that homosexuality/bisexuality is wrong. I believe it to be unnatural. By unnatural I mean contrary to the laws or course of nature. I do not believe that people are "born that way". I do believe ,however, that people have more of a genetic disposition to become gay. That is, because of their genetic makeup they are more likely to live a homosexual lifestyle when circumstances give a nudge in that direction.

This genetic disposition I'm talking about is the same as any other inherent trait to be a certain way. For example: alcoholism, anger, sex addiction, drug addiction, etc. All of these traits are influenced by genetic factors. An individual can choose how to react to them. Just because you have a disposition to become an alcoholic doesn't mean you have to be an alcoholic. Should we allow alcoholics to drink and drive? I mean come on, they were born that way. We shouldn't try to change who they are. No, a man who's genes make him more likely to be an alcoholic should probably not drink. In the same way an individual more genetically disposed to become a homosexual does not have their choices taken away. They still choose their own lifestyle.

That's how I feel about the lifestyle itself. People will call it ignorant. I disagree. I am informed. I know what homosexuality is and I still oppose it. Liberals have a lot of tricks to help them seem on the side of good. They call their acceptance of something different "progressive". As if everyone who opposes their point of view is not as enlightened as they are. All those bigots who believe differently just need time to be swayed over to their side of thinking because they're making progress. Everyone fights change, but hey, progress will win out. You know, maybe your idea isn't "progressive". Maybe it's just plain wrong. Maybe people have thought homosexuality is wrong for millenia because homosexuality is wrong. How's that for an idea?

Ok, next point. You tell me that my opposition is based on religious ideals and that religion has no place in legislation. Very well then, tell me whose idea of right and wrong should we use? Everyone has a concept of what is right and what is wrong and they try and alter the laws accordingly. So what is your opinion of right and wrong based on? There has to be a general standard. If we can't use our morals to make these decisions then you can't tell me that anything is wrong. Our country is built on the Christian morals of our founding fathers. Those Christian ideals are what all of our laws are based on. That's why you women are allowed to walk around without your whole body covered in layers of clothes. That's why we're allowed to kill and eat cows. That's why we don't have a caste system. If you take religious ideals out of the lawmaking process you will get chaos. They define our ideas of right and wrong.

So what do I want to do about homosexuals? Nothing at all. It's not my business. Live how you want, do what you want, I don't care. I don't hate homosexuals. I think what they do is apalling and repulsive, but I don't hate them because of it. I've had gay friends and we got along fine. I believe every person has the right to make their own decisions about how they are going to live. We shouldn't lock them up because they're gay.

That being said, I cannot in good conscience support any sort of legislation that is in favor of gay marriage. If I were to support such a law it would be the same as saying that homosexuality is right and good. It would be saying that I think it's the exact same thing as heterosexual marriage. I cannot give that recognition. Homosexuals are already allowed civil unions. "Parties to a civil union have all the same protections, responsibilities, and rights as partners in marriage." I got that quote off dictionary.com. So those of you that say we're stepping on the rights of homosexuals are incorrect. They have all the same rights, they just can't call it marriage. The fight to be allowed to call it marriage is somewhat baffling. I mean, you've got everything you want. Everything except the recognition of everyone else saying you are right. Why is that recognition so important? I'll take heat for this comment, but I think it's because deep down homosexuals know it's wrong and they want validation from everyone else that what they are doing is right and good.

Now, you say that I have no reason to oppose homosexuality other than my moral objection. That isn't true. Although I think my moral objection to such a practice is enough to justify opposition I also have other reasons. Marriage has always been between a man and a woman for good reason. The union of a man and a woman allows the creation of a child. That child can then be raised by the biological parents. The home can be a safe haven from the stresses and trials of the world where father, mother, and children love each other. The traditional family is the foundation of our society. Without it our entire socioeconomic structure will crumble.

A homosexual union cannot create children. It's impossible. Even if a surrogate is found only one of the pair is the actual biological parent. If a child is adopted into a homosexual home they are deprived of either a father figure or a mother figure. Men and women are different and contribute different things to their children. When a child is deprived of having either a mother or father it hampers their development as individuals. The same goes for a single parent trying to raise a child alone. They can't be both mother and father. Despite the intentions of gay parents, they can't replicate the traditional home. It's not the same thing and the child will suffer for it. I believe that if homosexual homes are accepted as the norm it will bring about the eventual destruction of the traditional family.

If legislation were passed that made gay marriage legal it would mean that it would have to be taught in society as the exact same thing as traditional marriage. That means my children would be taught in school that homosexuality is good. Remember sex ed class? You want your kid being shown that stuff for homosexuality as well as heterosexuality? I mean, going through that class in just hetero style was enough. I think it could seriously screw a kid up to go through it again in homo style. My point is, I don't want the next generation being raised on have sex with who you will because there are no rules or boundaries. There are rules and boundaries. We're not animals. We can't just do what we feel when we feel it.

I believe I am tolerant. I think everyone should be allowed their own beliefs and ideas and as an American I believe they have the right to the pursuit of happiness in whatever manner they see fit as long as it doesn't stomp on the rights of others. I will defend a homosexual as readily as I'll defend a heterosexual. They are people the same as me. I will not agree with their practices however. I have my right of opinion too. That doesn't make me intolerant. It makes me opinionated. So don't go tearing me down and saying I'm intolerant and ignorant because I won't believe the same as you. That makes you intolerant for refusing to allow me to live by my beliefs.

LOST

2010-05-24T22:08:00.000-07:00

Ok, if you haven't seen the finale then don't read this post.

Last year I watch the first 5 seasons of LOST in a matter of weeks. I watched this season and I greatly enjoyed the show. That said, I have a few problems with the way it ended.

1. Unanswered questions
A. Where and when did this whole guardian thing start? When after becoming guardian do they get their powers? How do they learn to use these mystical powers?
B. What happened to Jack's dad's body? The smoke monster dude leaves the body and just copies it. And while we're on that, why can't he change from Locke's face? He changed a whole bunch of times.
C. What happened to the Dharma initiative? I mean, their people were wiped out and yet they still continued to drop supplies. They never went to find out what happened. They just gave up. What's the deal?
D. They made a big deal at the beginning about Walt being special and weird. Then they just wrote him out. What was the big deal about Walt?
E. Why did pregnant women always die? Was it always like that or was it like that after something happened like the Dharma incident?
F. Libby's story. Why was she in a mental hospital?
G. What was the light anyway? The source of life for the world? What exactly was so special about the light and the island? I know they're special, but why?!
H. Remember the Dharma observation post where they were supposed to write everything down in a log book and send it through a tube? Remember how they find all those tubes sitting somewhere? What's the deal with that?

That's just a few of the remaining questions that I thought of right now. If I rewatch the show I'm sure I'll come up with a lot more.

2. Pointless Actions
A. I thought the nuclear bomb thing made this like alternate world where the island didn't exist and so their lives were different and through Desmond they were all gonna remember and it would somehow tie the two worlds together and they'd all live happily ever after or something. I don't know. Since it turns out they were just dead, which is kind of dumb especially after watching the movie Passengers, then what was the purpose of setting of the nuclear bomb? It didn't do anything! They made this huge deal and they were back in the 70s specifically for this and it didn't bloody do anything! Why the bomb?!
B. Charlie found out it wasn't Penny's boat. He died for that. And so what? What did we gain from that information? Nothing different happened. Everyone still got killed off. They still went with the boat people. And Desmond said Claire would get on the helicopter if Charlie did that. Well, she never did.
C. I can't remember if they had a reason to move the island. I totally forget. But if not, then why'd it happen?
D. Remember the couple who killed each other over diamonds and got buried alive? What was the point of that episode?

3. Leading us on. You know, I like a good mystery, but can't you at least give us an answer every once in awhile. I went through 6 seasons just getting more and more questions with barely ever being tossed a tiny morsel which just opened up a bigger question.

That's all I got right now. Again, I enjoyed the series. I'll need to watch it all through from 1 to 6 just to make sure all my complaints are justified. It was original and I never knew what was coming which is very different from every other show or movie I see. I can always see a mile away what's about to happen. It had a good story and good characters. If you agree or disagree on any point please feel free to let me know what and why.

Baby's in Charge

2010-05-10T11:47:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I had a baby 7 weeks ago today just in case you haven't heard that. Her name is Naomi. We went to our new ward for the first time yesterday and they had us introduce ourselves. While holding the baby I told everyone that we'd been married for six months. Nobody laughed at first, so Julie jumped up and clarified that we've been married for almost a year. I saw the confusion and shock disappear out of their eyes and they started laughing. Anyway, that's besides the point.

I won't go into the grisly details of having a baby. You all know about the crying and the pooping and the spit up and getting no sleep, etc. I swear though, my baby takes some sort of sick pleasure in throwing up right after her bath or after we put her in a new outfit. She only smiles after throwing up, so she knows she's not supposed to do it. I can't help but laugh after she looks so pleased with herself after vomiting on her new dress.

I've heard lots of people say their baby always cries when she's getting changed. Mine doesn't. She can be screaming when I put her on the ground, but as soon as I start changing she'll quiet down until I'm done changing her. It's the weirdest thing. Sometimes when she won't stop screaming i'll put her down where we change her diaper and it'll give me a minute or two of peace before she realizes she's been fooled. Then she screams with double the fury to make up for it.

I'm not sure where she came off thinking she's the boss. She won't listen to reason and she doesn't respond to threats. I've told her a number of times that I'm going to give her away or sell her or if she doesn't stop screaming I'll put her outside the door for a little while and if she's not good I won't let mommy feed her for two days. She just ignores me and makes me pick her up and hold her and rock her. I'm like a slave to the baby. She's cost me several online games of Starcraft because I had to rush to her aid.

I think she believes Julie when at 3 am she yells out "Baby I'm gonna kill you!" That scares me and the baby. When Julie reaches that point I know it's my turn to take care of the baby. Sometimes the baby convinces us to let her sleep on the big bed with us. It's nice when I wake up and roll over and the baby is right there and she smiles at me. It makes me smile until of course she throws up on my pillow. She'll glare at me all the time too. I'll do something stupid and she'll bring down her eyebrows and just stare me down till I hang my head in shame. I love my little baby.

Regrets

2010-04-26T12:28:00.001-07:00

I was on facebook today reading one of my friend's rants about healthcare. It reminded me of Miles' blog. There are quite a few blogs I read. I enjoy them and I even comment on a few of them, but I never enjoyed any quite as much as Miles' blog. It dealt with important issues that I care about and was still witty and funny. I often recommend people to read a certain post on Miles' blog that I remember because he has the same opinion as I do, but he's much better informed and presents the information more eloquently than I am capable of.

Rebekah, I do enjoy your blog, but you often talk about movies and other stuff like the day crew that I am just not a part of. I do read every blog post you write, but since I'm not at all involved in what occurs or since I haven't seen that movie, I feel completely unable to comment.

Anyway, I looked and saw that the last real post from Miles was almost a year ago back in July. He made three posts since and an aborted side blog with a couple posts on it. It made me very sad. I reread some of Miles posts today and think the world is a darker place without new posts to lighten our way. And yet, can one ask Miles to restart his blog? No, such a thing has to come from the heart and I believe Miles has lost the desire to be a part of the blog world. Maybe if more people had commented. Maybe if we were more supportive. Maybe, maybe, if only, perhaps... We're left only with regrets.

The 80-20 Rule

2010-02-25T12:10:00.000-08:00

I heard about this rule from someone in my ward years ago and after all this time I've decided it's completely true. Allow me to explain what the 80-20 rule is. It claims that you can accomplish 80% of a task with 20% of the required time. The other 80% of your time is spent completing the final 20% of the task. For example, if you need to study 10 hours to get 100% on your test and you study for two hours you'll probably get a B- or 80%. To get that perfect score you'll have to spend another 8 hours drilling on that test.

I've found this to be the case with other assignments and papers as well. It's easy to bang out a decent paper, but to get it really good so the teacher thinks it's great takes a huge amount of time. This also works for things besides school. You can get decent at any sport if you take a fair amount of time doing it. However, to excel, to truly be the best, you have to spend hour after hour after hour. When you do that it gets to the point where it's not fun anymore. This works with video games, hobbies, cleaning, work, making your wife happy, or anything else you can think of.

It is by following this rule that I have been able to be good at just about everything I try. I'll pick something up and be decent at it in a very short time. I'll never be the best an anything though because I refuse to spend that extra 80% of my time doing it. It's just never worth it to me. It's not fun anymore once you devote that amount of time. It gets boring or I get tired or I want to try something else. The end result is usually the same anyway. My wife is just as happy with the surprise flowers as she would be if I wrote her a song and got a group of friends to perform it for her while I present her with lavish gifts.

Getting a B- is still good grades, my bosses are always happy, I'm always picked for sports teams, I win on Warcraft and Halo, I get that puzzle put together, my wife loves me, the house looks ok. Or I could perfect every one of those things and be stressed out all the time and exhausted and hate my life.

Cancellation

2010-02-12T22:31:00.001-08:00

I said in my last post that I would put more urbandictionary.com definitions. I have since changed my mind. You see, I got a pretty good response with the last post, so I think I better pull out of that before it gets as stale as The Simpsons after 20 years. It's just not funny anymore and neither would be another post based on urbandictionary. So if there are words you'd like to see, by all means go to the site yourself and look them up. I, being encouraged with the comments I got, hope to soon create a completely original post. I'm a funny man and I think funny things. I just gotta remember to put them on here so you can all read and laugh and comment. Because I love comments. They're like TV ratings. TV ratings keep the shows coming. They make the poor, sad actors feel good about themselves.

My baby comes out next month. Julie tries to take credit for it because she's carried it around, but I put it in there! We're excited.

Urbandictionary.com

2010-02-10T10:53:00.001-08:00

I found some rather amusing definitions on urbandictionary.com that I'd like to share with the readers of my blog.

Mormon:
1. 99% live in Utah.
2. Napoleon Dynamite is their hero.
3. believe green jello is a sacred food.
4. have 28045345.5 kids.
5. use slang curse words: oh my ____ (heck, gosh, fetch...)
6. pretty much have the hottest girls around...

Oh my gosh are the Smiths mormons?! We better have a party so they can bring some frickin' sweet green jello!...

Jacob:
A Jacob is perfect in every single way. He's a gentleman, he's smart, funny, incredibly gorgeous, silly, and mature. He knows just what to say and just when to say it and is the kind of guy you want to spend the rest of your life with. Every time you look at him your heart stops beating and you cant breath and then he looks at you and suddenly your heart is going a mile a minute and you're breathing so hard you're afraid that your chest may explode. He's an angel.
Sally: Hi Jacob!!

Jacob: Hi Sally :]

*Sally melts into a little puddle of unbelievable happiness*

Another Jacob Definition:
A guy who is awesomely cool, and perfect in every way. Flowers bloom where he walks, and people pay him just to look at them.

Miles:
1) The sweetest, most amazing boyfriend anyone could ask for.
2) The one person that you can't spend enough time with, and every minute you're apart makes you need him even more.
3) A guy that can put a smile on your face, no matter what kind of day you're having.
4) Someone that makes your heart stop just by looking into his eyes.
5) A person that makes you wish time would stand still when you're together, but at the same time, makes you look forward to a future together.

Rebekah:
Rebekah is another way to call someone really awesome, This name is also givin to really cute, playful and sweet girls and you just have to love them xD

Jared:
1.someone who has achieved the mastery of greatness
2.someone you would stride to be like
3.a manifestation of excellence

Benjamin:
In some areas of the UK to benjamin something is to make love with it. A benjamin with 3 or more people is called 'A Big Bad Benjamin.'

Sarah:
1:A realy cool girl, but a little hyper. Always seems to be in her own world. And normally good looking.

Rachel:
The most edible female name

Mary:
one who is seemingly innocent. Mary is commonly known as a good girl, however, Mary is a bad girl who never gets caught.

James:
Someone who likes looking up his name on Urban Dictionary.

Lorenzo:
person with stupid comebacks

Nancy:
Mocking term for a man engaging in feminine activities or otherwise compromising his masculinity.

Julie:
a girl who talks too much but also very hottt!

Jen: (no, I didn't forget the sisters in law. Besides, Jen might be the only one who gets this far down my post.)
super beautiful. you cant outsmart her. YOU WILL FAIL. all hail the fail whale. because whales always fail. hates celery. likes to get low. loves presidents.

Celeste:
Female name, usually they are very large (in width) people. Their hair is normally straight (by a straight iron) and they are normally insane. Guys normally hate people named Celeste because they are normally HUGE prudes and a pain in the butt.

Craig:
Being lazy without intentions of doing anything

Matt:
Commonly used as a male name, and can also be short for "Matthew".

Erik:
The heterosexual way of spelling the name Eric.

Stephen:
A name given to you if your parents knew you would be a complete failure, so decisded to start it off with a GAY name

Well, I got a little carried away with the names there. In the near future I may find some other words to post. For now, spend a couple hours reading this post.

Pirates!

2010-01-31T09:44:00.000-08:00

Pirates used to be cool. Several hundred years ago they were cool. Now they're just these lame Somalians who have been pestering the world for the last couple years. Here's what I don't get. We have the technology to crush any nation on earth. We can send missiles to any location on the earth. We can do, basically, whatever we want. Why don't we take a day and blow those worthless Somalian pirates up? We know where they're stationed. We know who they are. Somalia has just been a blemish on the face of the earth for the last twenty years anyway. Just blow them up so we don't see anymore news stories about hijacked European ships.

I'd say the Europeans should go do it themselves, but come on. When's the last time Europe managed to do anything without the U.S. holding their hands? They can't even handle problems in their own tiny continent. Remember Yugoslavia? Yeah, we were there. Maybe if the Somalians were cool and had some sense of honor I'd say leave em alone. If they were stealing money and food to help feed their country I wouldn't have that big a problem. But kidnapping people for ransom and then killing them? Where's the class in that? They have no honor, no code of morality. They're just a bunch of bullies who need to be wiped out, so please mighty American military; squash that roach.

St. Louis Party

2009-11-19T05:14:00.000-08:00

I've always claimed that I'm from St. Louis. I lived there for about three years. I graduated from high school there and the only long-term friends I have besides my family members are from there. So I've always considered myself a St. Louis man unlike my older siblings who claim Kansas City and my younger siblings who claim little podunk towns in Colorado and Utah. However, I discovered last night that I belong in St. Louis about as much as I belong in Little Rock, Arkansas. Which is to say, not at all.

Last night Craig dragged me along to a "St. Louis party" which was just a gathering of people from St. Louis at Brick Oven pizza. Besides my friends that I hang out with all the time I only knew two people and I don't like them much. The feeling is mutual. I recognized a couple others and we exchanged pleasantries. A few others recognized me and said hi although I don't remember ever meeting them or talking to them before. It's always weird when someone knows your name and where you're from and you're pretty sure you've never seen them before. The rest of the people didn't know me and I didn't know them and after looking at them and listening to them I decided I'd prefer to keep it that way.

It was a very boring night. I sat next to Matt and we just sipped our drinks while everyone around us was reminiscing about our days in St. Louis. The only person I exchanged any real conversation with was someone not even from St. Louis. She was engaged to one of the St. Louis people and looked about as lost and unwelcome as I felt. I had quite a few friends back in the day in St. Louis, but they're all spread all over the country now and I just didn't run in this crowd. I didn't belong in this gathering. I realized that if I were to go back to St. Louis I'd have no one to see and nowhere to stay. It was a sad realization as I've always looked back upon my days in St. Louis with fondness.

So once again I've decided that I have no home. I'd never claim Utah, I've been too long away from Missouri and I'd rather claim Iraq than Kansas. I plan to move back to Missouri in the not too distant future and so maybe I'll be able to claim it as my home again.

On a sentimental note, one year ago today was the first time I cuddled with my wife. Now she's almost five months pregnant with my child. How about that.

My EMT Training...

2009-10-29T22:43:00.000-07:00

I'm taking an EMT course. EMTs are the first ones to arrive on the scene when something happens be it a car accident, suicide, or trouble breathing. That's why I'm a little concerned about what my teachers are telling me. If I'm gonna be there first then I need to know what I'm doing because otherwise my ignorance could cost someone their life. Therefore, I need to trust my teachers to train me. The following are a few words and phrases I've heard in class:

Periphial (instead of peripheral)
Tibula (instead of tibia)
Thoratic cavity (not thoracic)
big trauma thingy (?)

That's only a few that I pulled off the top of my head. They mispronounce medical terms all the time that I already know. If they can't get their terms right then how can I trust the other things they say? To make matters worse I've received conflicting instructions from various teachers who teach in our class. A few times they have told us the exact opposite of what the teacher told us in the previous class period. That kind of worries me. I know hyperventilation is no big deal, but what if it's important and they do that? Then we had the four hour lecture on back safety. I could have summed it up in five seconds: Lift with your legs and don't twist your back! That was basically the whole lecture. Four hours long. Not kidding.

There are silly little things too, but they're important to us students. Every single test there has been a large portion of material that we haven't covered yet. Then we cover that material the following week. Does that seem backwards to anybody? The class, however, is quite easy which also worries me. I've taken a total of four pages of handwritten notes this semester. I do not own the textbook nor have I read any of it from other sources. The guys at my table and I make fun of the teachers, lectures, and our classmates all throughout each class period when we're not physically bandaging amputated arms or extracting people from imaginary car accidents. And yet, I got a 90% on the last test. Let's pray that our EMTs are being trained adequately because next time you need help it might be me who shows up.

Teenagers as Sex Objects

2009-10-07T23:22:00.000-07:00

The other day my wife told me about this song she likes. She was quick to point out that she in not normally a Miley Cyrus fan, but she likes this song. She wanted me to listen to it, so I pulled it up on youtube and we watched it. Ok, I know I'm not up to speed on pop culture, but isn't that girl 16? Because she doesn't dress 16 or act 16 or dance 16. In fact, it seems every effort was made to make her appear to be at least 18 and you can bet all the skanky dancers around here were at least 18. A child was portrayed as an adult in that video. And you can bet it has an effect on her. I'm pretty sure she doesn't think of herself as a child anymore. She's probably already got this complex about being the center of the universe. It happens to a lot of child stars, but now she thinks she's an adult.

I thought about that and it seemed really sad to me, so I decided to check and see if it was an isolated incident. It definitely is not. A large number of teenage girls are portrayed as adult or at least in adult situations where they have to make adult decisions. And I'm not even talking about sex, although that's a part of it. What kind of message is that sending to kids watching these shows and videos and following their lives? Even some of the cartoons. I saw an episode of this Teen Titans show while I was at work. It's about these teenage superheroes. First, where are their parents? Why are they allowed to live on their own and do all this stuff? Second, where did all the money come from for all their stuff? They have their own tower with sophisticated security systems and all this other crap. This may seem kind of silly for me to rant about, but it's part of the problem. In order to attract teen and pre-teen children these shows are portraying teens as adults who can lead adult lives.

Then we've got the models. Lots of models are between 14 and 17. Not legal yet, but they are on the fashion runway as adults. The youngest bigshot I found was a 13 year old girl who's first major runway thing, (whatever it's called), was the day before she turned 13. How messed up is that? And you wonder why we've got so many creepy pedophiles out there? I'm not excusing any such sick behavior, but it's not gonna help the problem when you've got 15 year old girls strutting their stuff in bikinis on the runway. Then you've got Miley Cyrus with her half naked pictures all over the internet, that Spears girl getting pregnant at 16, and I'm not sure who Vanessa Hudgens is, but apparently she had some near naked pictures too. And these are people our little kids are watching on the Disney Channel and our teenage girls are idolizing and imitating.

I can't blame the girls. Everyone loves to point fingers at child stars gone bad, but come on. They're children! The irresponsible ones who should bear most of the blame are the parents who thrust their child out into a world that they aren't ready for and then cry when the child can't handle it. I could name any number of these child stars. The parents bear the majority of the blame and then the movie, music, and tv industries that made their roles. Kids have a little trouble judging the difference between reality and imagination. You tell them they're something long enough and they'll believe it. However, we are all responsible for our own actions, so these child stars still bear a portion of the blame and need to stop acting like idiots. It would be ok for miss Miley Cyrus to say, "You know what? I think I'll pass on being a slut today. Thanks for the offer though." I feel bad for her though. Her childhood was stolen.

Racism and Politics

2009-09-21T23:03:00.000-07:00

You know, I don't get it. Why do people always have to pull the race card? Everything isn't always about racism! Whenever a story hits the front page and there are two people who oppose each other and they happen to be of different races someone always screams: Racism!!! And then everyone jumps on the bandwagon and all of a sudden the issue is forgotten because the racism trump card has taken over. It's stupid. I think racism could die if we'd just let it die.

Some people can't let go of their roots. Look at the Mormons. Almost two hundred years ago the Mormons got persecuted pretty badly. People yelled at them, spit on them, beat them, imprisoned them, stole their lands and their homes, and killed them. That's pretty horrible. However, you'll notice I said "them". I'm a Mormon, but I said them because it never happened to me! I have not ever experienced any real persecution and not very many Mormons alive today have experienced it. And yet we all still have this persecution complex that we can't seem to let go. Oh, everyone treats us so bad because we're Mormons!! No they don't! They may make fun of us and not agree with us and I've heard the occasional derogatory comment, but so what? I think I don't need to worry about that.

The same goes for racism. Yes, our history is full of racism. Just about every ethnicity was the target of hate crimes at one time or another in this country. They've been despised, rejected, mistreated, and subjected to every inhumane crime imaginable. But you know what? That doesn't happen very often anymore. Very rarely do we hear about this sort of hate crime occurring and when it does there is a great showing of public outrage. As a society we don't tolerate racism anymore. That period is over and done with, hopefully forever. Yes, acts of racism will occur. You'll never get rid of all the ignorant jerks out there, but as a whole I think we're doing pretty good. So I think people need to get off their high horse and quit pointing the finger at everyone who disagrees with something someone of another race says.

I am a white man. I've always been a white man. I don't know what it's like to be Asian or Black. I'd give it a shot for awhile if I could, but I can't. I'll try and explain how I feel about this situation. I have to be extremely careful in public with anything I say. I've been accused of a lot things because of a flippant comment every now and then. I don't mean anything by it, but I've seen a tiny phrase taken and manipulated so that it looks like I'm some horrible racist or chauvinist. I'm not, but people are very quick to believe I am because I'm a white man. This is getting out of hand. Pretty soon I won't be able to speak or look at someone of another ethnicity without being called a racist. Let me give a few examples:

Rep. Joe Wilson shouted out during President Obama's speech "You lie!" Now that was wrong. It was stupid, irritating, discourteous, and bad-mannered. You don't shout out during anyone's speech. That's just rude. You do not shout at the president of the United States. I do not believe, however, that this was racially motivated. If you haven't noticed, we've been having these outbursts all over the country in town hall meetings when this subject has come up. I'd like to say that this is ridiculous. Shouting and interrupting never gets anything resolved. It was an embarrassment to our democratic system. This was just one more out of place outburst by some idiot and that should be an end to it. It wasn't racist.

I've heard from a number of sources that the opposition to President Obama's healthcare reform is racially motivated. Once again, that's not true. Usually the simplest explanation is correct one. People are opposed to the president's healthcare plan because they don't like the president's healthcare plan! That's all there is to it, so instead of talking about how racist everyone is maybe we should look at this healthcare plan and see why everyone hates it. We elected the man! If we didn't want a black president we wouldn't have elected a black president! I don't believe we'd let racism blind us to the issue at hand after just ignoring racism and electing him.

There have been a number of protests throughout the country. In those protests President Obama has been portrayed negatively. A few examples are his portrayal as Hitler and as a witch doctor. Oh, people were quick to shout racism on those. Guess what? Every president has been caricatured and protested and ridiculed! People will always do that to anyone! It's not because of his race! President Obama isn't the first to be depicted as Hitler and he certainly won't be the last. President Bush was often portrayed as a monkey. I bet the racemongers would have jumped on that pretty quick if President Bush had been black. They would have been shouting racist from coast to coast. Let's look at our own history and see that clever, angry artists (and sometimes not so clever ones) will take any aspect, especially physical aspects, and make a president look like a fool. It's not racism.

Now, let me show how a few things have been created which are ok for the minority, but if the majority tried it they would be impaled with a barrage of criticsm:

Black Entertainment Television-can you see a White Entertainment Television being created? The outrage would be in the news for months.

Black Entertainment News

Chocolate News-Hey! Let's make fun of white people! This show was recently cancelled and people are saying it's because the nation isn't ready for black people to comment on the news while having a black president. Are you serious? Maybe the show was offensive or maybe it just plain sucked.

Miss Black America Pageant-Ok, so white people are excluded. That sounds pretty racist to me. There's no Miss White America Pageant. Again, it would be shut down immediately.

In Living Color-a tv show. I watched quite a few episodes and they loved to make fun of white people. Jim Carrey was on the cast and seemed to be quite the outsider although he did a pretty good job of playing the pathetic white man.

The Resolution to Apologize for Slavery-Get over it! No living person was a slave. No living person was a slave owner. They've all died and may they rest in peace or in Hell as they deserve. I had nothing to do with it. I'm not apologizing for anything. And look at it this way. Africa is in shambles. AIDS is rampant. I recently heard a statistic that 70% of the people on the continent are HIV positive. That may be high, but still, it's crazy. Social order is existant in only a handful of countries. Civil war and tribal wars rage unchecked and genocide is a constant goal of many military groups. It's horrible what happened to your ancestors, but you are lucky that they were dragged over to this country because you live in the land of opportunity. That may sound harsh, but it's true. So seriously, get over the slavery thing.

Black Planet the "largest black community online"-Really? Is that necessary? Way to make me feel like I don't belong. That only hurts my feelings a little bit.

Do you see what I'm getting at? If anything these organizations and communities are keeping racism on the front of our minds, which in turn is keeping racism alive because they are screaming out that they are different because of the color of their skin. I think as a country we should let racism die. I'm tired of being told I don't understand because I'm white. I'm tired of being afraid to speak or disagree with another ethnicity for fear of being called a racist. Let it go. If someone actually does something racist then let's call them out and deal with it, but stop yelling racist every two minutes.

Tennis Master of the Universe for the Weekend

2009-09-04T18:25:00.001-07:00

Craig and I were a little excited about our upcoming tournament, so today we played a best two out of three Tennis Master of the Universe for the Weekend game. It started out fantastically with me killing Craig in the first match. However, things went downhill and I failed to win the other games and had to concede the title to Craig. He's now upstairs enjoying the spoils of victory while I'm sitting at home alone smelling bad in a pool of my own sweat. Our much anticipated Tennis Master of the Universe for the Week game is coming up and there are still VIP seats available. We are expecting a sell-out crowd, so be sure to reserve your places now.

Tennis Master of the Universe

2009-08-30T20:11:00.001-07:00

The last couple months I've been playing tennis quite often with Craig. We're both fat and lazy, so it's been our feeble attempt at physical activity. Anyway, the last game of every day turned into a sort of tournament game. We decided to call the winner of that game the Tennis Master of the Universe for the Day. I mean, it's not like anyone will come forth to dispute that title. So every day one of us gets to go home and proudly declare to his wife that he is the Tennis Master of the Universe for the Day.

This Saturday we played and for the first time ever the winner got to declare himself as the Tennis Master of the Universe for the Weekend! It was thus decided because the game ended in a shutout. After his rather humiliating defeat Craig decided on something new. This week we will have a set of three games. The winner of two out of three of these games will gain the exalted title of Tennis Master of the Universe for the Week! He extended this challenge on his blog: Escape from Bubble Nation. Terms and conditions for attending and sponsoring this tournament were outlined there. I would like to invite all available parties to come and see the great Tennis Master of the Universe for the Week event. VIP seating is limited as are mugs and T-shirts, so be the first to order.

Police Beat

2009-08-07T18:29:00.000-07:00

A lot of us hate the Provo cops. I hate them more than most people. However, when you see what they have to do all day and the stupid stuff people call them for, maybe you can understand why they're such stupid, dumb@!&*, *@#-&*!@, mother&#^*ers!

Dec. 29: A male student was reported suspiciously looking into cars in a campus parking lot. Police discovered that the student was actually looking into his own car, looking for his backpack.

Jan. 6: Police discovered two male students had created a ramp by packing snow against a window at Helaman Halls. The students planned to jump from the window of the building and go down the ramp. Police asked the students to remove the snow and no further action was taken.

Aug. 31-Sept 10: A 10 x 18 inch mirror was reported stolen from an office on the second floor of the library. The estimated value of the mirror is $20.

Sept 16: Juveniles were reported launching objects in the Richards Building area, in the direction of the pool. As police were taking this report, another victim complained about somebody throwing objects from the west overpass on North Campus Drive. Police think the two incidents are related. One of the victims followed the suspects to Helaman Halls and got a room number. Nobody responded at the room but police are following up on this incident.

Sept 17: A 21-year-old female student reported a suspicious man near the old UVSC campus, west of Helaman Halls. The suspect was described as a 30-year-old man, 5-foot-10, normal build, scruffy face, a two-day-old beard, a European accent and wearing a tan baseball cap, tan shirt and dark pants. He was reported for being suspicious simply because he didn't fit the profile of a student or an employee, and being a little bit off the main thoroughfare of campus, the student was concerned about it.

Sept 14: Two juveniles were reported rollerblading down the rails at LaVell Edwards Stadium. They scratched the paint off the rails and left deep gouges in the lawn where they landed. Their parents were contacted and they were sent home.

Sept 12: A conflict, due to a failure to communicate and talk problems out, was reported between two 18-year-old female students living in M. Smith Hall in Heritage Halls. The roommates have been arguing over apartment chores and accusing one another of destroying each other's food. Profanity and some hair pulling was involved. This has been turned over to the housing office for a resolution

July 27: Someone thought there was possibly a burglary when they returned to their car and a window was broken out. Nothing appeared to be missing from the car, so officers think the window may have exploded because of the heat.

July 27: There was a complaint in the HBLL of a male visitor looking at adult pornography on the computer. This was not the first complaint against him for this type of conduct and he was banned from campus for 72 hours.

July 18: There was a dispute over a call a referee made during a soccer game. The argument became heated and the police had to make peace and escort the arguers off the field.

July 3: Officers responded to a suspicious person at the Bookstore upset about the deodorant selection. The person picked up a stick of deodorant, kicked it across the floor, then paid for the deodorant and left.

That's only a small selection from the Provo Police Beat. These are ridiculous things the cops had to put up with. There were some where the cops were being jerks, but I left those out.

Axis of Evil

2009-07-03T02:04:00.001-07:00

Ok, maybe you all think I'm going a little overboard with my blogs over the past few days. Well, I came across this message from the President of the United States. I think it needs to be shared with you all. It's a little outdated since it comes from the 2002 State of the Union Address, but it's quite hilarious.

President George W. Bush: Good evening, America. I'm very happy to be back in this country, after my very successful trip in the Pacific Rim. I'm heartened to hear that, for the most part, the people of this country show strong support for my agenda. However, lately, there are some who are beginning to criticize this administration. Maybe these people don't understand - America is presently at war. Not just a war on terrorism; but we are engaged in a deadly stand-off with an Axis of Evil. You know who I'm talking about - Iran, Iraq, and one of the Koreas.

But my Axis of Evil doesn't seem to interest the people out there. Some people just want to talk about the economy, and budgets, and Enron. I bet most of you out there don't even understand Enron. I sure as heck don't! It hurts my head to think about it. So, from now on, Enron will be part of my Axis of Evil. I don't want to hear anything else about Enron, unless our military has pounded it into submission. So, look out, Enron - you're now part of the Axis of Evil.

So is the Economy. I don't like the way this economy is acting; not very American, it's evil! The economy is now a part of my Axis of Evil.

Also, I don't like Senator Tom Daschle. You know why? He's very critical. You know where that leads him? You got it. He's now part of the Axis of Evil.

So, quick recap - that's Iran, Iraq, Enron, the Economy, and Daschle, and one of those Koreas. They all form a terrible Axis of Evil, standing in the way of all that we as Americans value.

And don't forget France. The French don't like me saying "Axis of Evil", so guess what? They're now a part of the very same Axis of Evil that they don't like me saying. How do you like them apples, France? Next time, you keep your mouth shut. You mess with Texas, and it's straight to the Axis of Evil, got it?

Germany, Italy, Japan - they were the original Axis of Evil. Maybe they thought I would forget, but I didn't. They're back in!

Here's one you probably didn't expect - Dick Cheney. Now, he's up to something, and I don't like it! He's never around. If I'm in the White House, he's not. If I'm on a plane, no where in sight. He's very sneaky; not to mention, scary. I'm putting him in the Axis of Evil - for now.

Evil Knievel's going in the Axis of Evil - but that's a no-brainer. But Dr. Evil? No; he makes me laugh, so he's out.

So, you see, America? There's nothing to fear. Everything's fine. You go out and buy your new cars, fly on airplanes, and invest in K-Mart. Don't listen to what the economists say. Why? Because they like math, and math is very much a part of the Axis of Evil.

Wives are Good for Something

2009-07-02T12:50:00.000-07:00

I noticed that I can always count on my wife to comment on my posts. It may not be witty; in fact, it may be insulting, but she's there commenting and that makes me feel loved. I knew I kept her for some reason.

Blog Recession

2009-07-02T12:19:00.000-07:00

I don't know if anyone else has noticed this, but it seems to me like no one is posting on their blogs these days. I don't follow all that many blogs, but the ones I do check regularly have very few new posts on them. Jen used to blog all the time, but it's been a month since her last post. Miles always had something new, but now we're lucky to get a new blog every couple weeks. Jared never did post much and neither did Celeste, so I guess that's nothing new. I've been posting less and less over the past 6 months. Rebekah is the only one who still posts on a regular basis. There are a few other blogs I check in on from time to time and it seems as if they died.

Also, we've all stopped commenting on each other's blogs. People need encouragement! More comments mean more posts and we all like posts, so we should all comment. I'm sure there's a mathematical equation that shows that the number of comments is directly proportional to the number of posts. I think we need to pull ourselves out of this blog recession. We can do it a whole lot better than Obama can pull our country out of its economic recession. In fact, I think he's making it worse. Anyway, on a positive not I got an email from the xbox people today. They told me my machine has been repaired and is on its way back. All for free.

Q & A

2009-06-29T15:13:00.001-07:00

I've been planning on writing blogs in response to the requests I've received, but I got a little busy with the whole getting married thing. Then I was out of town. I'm a busy man consarnit! I'm gonna try and answer these things now.

Katie, Julie's old roommate, wanted my thoughts on marriage. She thinks that I've got some romantical notions about marital bliss. Well, I didn't have those notions. I expected marriage to be me spending a whole lot of time with my best friend who I also happen to sleep with. She tells me what to do and I decide whether it's worth fighting about. I actually managed to win a fight I knew was a losing battle from the get go. I'm so sick of wedding stuff. It's been my life for the past few months, so when Julie wanted me to go to a wedding reception with her I said no way. I said I won't have anything to do with weddings for at least six months. I won't go near them. Guess what? She didn't make me go! I was shocked, but I know I'm gonna pay for this one later. Anyway, she cooks most of the meals and I do most of the dishes. I know marriage is gonna be lots of disagreements, lots of "making up", and a lot of just spending time together when we're home.

Angie and Miles want to hear my five year plan. It's no secret that I've completely screwed up my schooling. It's almost to the point where it's unrecoverable. Well, this fall I'm taking an EMT course. It's 9 credit hours and afterwards I will be certified to be an EMT. After that is done I will be doing the paramedic program. When that is done I'll work as a paramedic while going back to BYU to repair and finish my degree. All of that will take a couple years. Maybe three. I will then attend Physician's Assistant school. That'll take care of the next two years. I'll then work as a PA, hopefully in Missouri. Julie is a special ed teacher, so she's making some money too.

Melanie wants to know the 10 stupidest things I've done in my life.

10. Got put on academic warning
9. Got put on academic probation
8. Got put on academic suspension
7. Bible bashed with a Jehovah's Witness. I don't care how much better your arguments are, it's like hitting your head against a brick wall. They just don't listen.
6. Drank a glass of pure vinegar. It burns the throat and hurts the stomach. Don't try it.
5. Drank another one several years later.
4. Worked a full time night job while going to school full time without a break for two years. Talk about a burn out.
3. Bit Miles while he was pounding me when I was a kid. He didn't like that. I think he threw me halfway across the basement. I laid there for about 45 minutes.
2. Kissed Bre. Talk about desperation.
1. Admitted that I kissed Bre.

Jen wanted to know who would win in a fight; Homer or Peter Griffin. Now I don't watch Family Guy. I thinks it's a stupid show and quite perverse. But I've seen this Peter Griffin. He's fatter than Homer. Dumber than Homer. The dumb things he does aren't hilarious like the dumb things Homer does. Homer was a boxer and a gymnast. Homer went to the moon. Homer lifted weights and scaled a mountain. Peter Griffin never did any of those things. Homer would kick his trash. I hate Family Guy.

Jared...I haven't done the research to answer your questions. I haven't seen the Terminator movies nor have I researched advanced artificial intelligence. As such, I do not know how these various machines would act in the given circumstance. I may choose to research said topic and answer this at a later date. However, I think Celeste was right. You should write this blog.

Dry Spell

2009-05-26T16:01:00.000-07:00

So it turns out that I haven't written a blog post in several months. This is a horrible tragedy, but I've been in the middle of a dry spell. I just haven't had much to say that hasn't been said by someone else and said better than i could put it. I have my opinions about politics. Gay rights and all that. I have very strong opinions. But nothing new and besides, the people who read my blog are the people who probably share my opinions anyway. So I've kept pretty quiet about Obama, the Middle East, the Catholic Church, Energy Conservation, the Economic Crisis, and a multitude of other issues. I don't really feel like telling you the mundane details of my life, so nothing comes from there. My job has been pretty boring, so no inspiration there. I'm gonna ask anyone who still checks my blog for an idea. Tell me something I should write about. It could be one of the above topics or it could be something completely different. Post an idea that I should blog about. I want to get a high quality post up before I get married in two weeks. I need participation here! Help me as I have helped you.

Zombies!

2009-02-28T14:09:00.001-08:00

To start out I wanna say that for most of my life I've thought Zombies were the stupidest or the horror creatures. They're dumb, slow, and they have no super powers. I never understood how a zombie infestation could occur. You'd think that just a couple people could take down whichever zombies happen to pop up and then it's all over. This summer I got turned on to the whole zombie idea. I read a couple of books by Max Brooks called "The Zombie Survival Guide" and "World War Z (An Oral History of the Zombie War)". Those books made zombies seem interesting and showed how an infestation is plausible.

First, I think it's necessary to explain zombies. Zombies are created by an infection from the virus Solanum. The origins of said virus are unknown. It has never been found in any natural environment. The virus is transmitted through fluids. The most common form of infection is by a bite from an infected individual. It is also transmissible by getting zombie goo in your eye or being poked by a zombie bone. The virus invades the brain and takes over the frontal lobe. It then shuts down all bodily functions so that the individual is perceived as dead. After a time the body reanimates. The brain at this point is like a parasite completely independent from the body. It uses the body systems but is not dependent on them. As such, the only way to "kill" a zombie is by destroying the brain.

The whole process from infection to reanimation can take place over the span of a few minutes or several weeks depending on where the infection took place and how much of the virus was injected. In this manner a zombie infestation can go from being a local problem to worldwide since an individual could receive a small bite wound on the hand and then take a plane to another country before succumbing to the virus. They then "die" and are taken to the hospital where they reanimate and bite the doctor, nurses, etc. The smallest amount of the virus is 100% fatal. Thankfully the virus is not airborne.

Zombies are indeed dumb and slow. Their intelligence is somewhere around the level of an insect. Since their tissue is necrotic they have somewhat stiff and very uncoordinated movements. They are, however, tireless. They don't sleep, they have no emotion, and their only instinct is to eat. They'll eat anything living, but for some unknown reason prefer human flesh. They're too stupid and uncoordinated to climb, but they'll try.

I've planned for a zombie out break in my current living conditions. I live on the second floor of the King Henry apartment complex. If I became aware of a potential outbreak I'd go to the store first thing and buy plenty of non perishable food. I'd make sure I had enough to keep me going for a few months in case things got nasty. I'd also buy a sledgehammer, a crowbar, a rifle, and a pistol. The sledgehammer would be to destroy the concrete stairs at my complex. That way the zombies couldn't get up to the second floor unless there were so many that they made a ramp of bodies up to us. In that case we'd be screwed. The crowbar would be a good zombie head smashing tool.

If an outbreak did occur I'd fill the tub and sinks with water in order to have a supply of fresh water. I'd also fill every dish with water. You can never have too much water. I'd have everyone on the floor do the same thing. I'd institute a blackout. No lights, no noise. We don't want to attract the dead to where we are. They don't logically search anything, so unless they hear or see us they'll just pass us by. I'd also organize watches so that we always have a lookout. Although I'm pretty sure the zombies can't get up to us you can never be too careful. We'd also have to watch for any regular people trying to climb up to us for safety. They might have been bitten already or they might be desperate and dangerous. At first we'd probably be in more danger from regular people than from zombies.

That should all be sufficient to keep us safe until the crisis is over. There is a chance, however slight, that the infestation will get out of control. In that case there would be thousands of zombies and small chance of rescue. In that case our supplies would be running low and we'd have to find ourselves a new fortress. I would have researched in the first days before power and water were lost where these potential locations can be found. I'd prefer going to a military base, but the only one I know of in Utah is an air force base in Ogden and that's too far away. My best guess is a prison would be the place to go. There's a nearby prison in Spanish Fork. I wouldn't want to take a big group, but I'd have to take everyone on my floor. It just wouldn't be ethical to abandon them. I might split us up into groups of 5 or 6. It's easier to escape detection moving in small groups.

Travel would have to be on foot. There are several reasons for this. First, cars make a lot of noise. We'd be attracting zombies from miles away. Second, at this point in the crisis most of the cars are probably out of gas and so are all the gas stations. Third, from the panic of the previous weeks or months the roads are most likely blocked with stalled vehicles. Bikes would be a good way to go, but not many of us have bikes, so we'd have to walk. The freeway is the safest way since it has high walls and good line of sight. A problem would be zombies stuck in cars. People who were bitten and turned in the car would be trapped in their cars and zombies make noise when they see you. This moan or wail that will attract other zombies. It is still the best way to go though. We'd take the freeway and head to the local prison. We'd leave in the morning and travel only in daylight hours. Hopefully we'd be able to make the trip in just one day. Camping out at night we'd have to keep a watch, but no fires, lights, or sounds. It would be a long night.

If we arrived safely I'd analyze the situation at the prison. If it's deserted that's great. We'll move in and set up shop. Hopefully it was abandoned and there are still supplies. Food in the cafeteria, weapons in the armory. We'd fortify the doors, keep a watch on the walls and wait for rescue. It's possible the prison is occupied. Maybe by other people who had the same idea as me or possibly by former guards and/or prisoners. If that's the case I need to be careful with deciding whether or not to even head in there. I'd have a backup location in mind, so we might go there. If the situation looked tolerable I'd approach whoever was in charge and see if we could move in there.

If the situation got worse and there were suddenly hundreds of thousands of zombies and there was still no help to be found I'm sure our prison would eventually be overrun. The only thing to do would be to head for more rural areas. Getting out of the immediate vicinity would be the hardest part, but there would be nothing close to safety for miles and miles around. If the prison had any armored vehicles I'd try to ram my little group through the wall of undead creatures swarming outside the prison. The prison would have materials for homemade explosives and whatnot. We'd try and carve a way out. We'd abandon the vehicles as soon as we were clear and start walking. If there were no vehicles we'd have to start a fire on one side as a distraction and blast our way out the other side. Then we'd have to run as far as possible and try to lose our pursuers. If they can keep our trail they'll keep following us forever. I suppose we could try to hang glide off the roof, but that's a pretty ridiculous idea. We'd be desperate enough to give it a shot though.

If we magically escaped the general area of the prison and eluded pursuit I'd take Canyon Road. It goes through the Uinta Forest and joins up with highway 40 at Strawberry Reservoir. Fresh water here and then we'd move on to Roosevelt. My family has a house there where my brother is already living and hopefully Roosevelt wouldn't be horribly infested. It's a small town that's pretty isolated. From there I'd have to make a new plan when I saw what the situation was like. Hopefully I'd have been able to gather enough information before leaving the prison to already have a pretty good idea.

Anyway, that's my basic plan for a zombie infestation here in Provo. In the real thing I'd definitely refine my plan, but come on. Zombies don't really exist, so that would be silly.

Politics

2009-02-03T11:39:00.001-08:00

I've never been a supporter of Obama. I've had various reasons and they all are still valid. However, he is the leader of our country now and so I'm willing to give him a chance and see what he does. Unfortunately, what I've seen so far isn't very promising. I've been opposed to quite a few of the ideas I've heard. I also just came across this article. I think you should read it.

http://www.facebook.com/ext/share.php?sid=47268979674&h=eIssG&u=FJE_Q

It's ok to push the continue button when you click on the link. I tried to get the link without going through facebook, but it would require an account with the Washington Post. Anyway, read it.

Blogs, Mormons, and 24

2009-01-13T02:32:00.000-08:00

I just spent about half an hour writing a blog, but I read over it and I really didn't like it, so I erased it and I'm starting over. I don't really have anything funny or inspirational to say, but I wanna write a blog dang it! I just spent the last hour reading obscure blogs of people I don't know that well. I've gotta say I'm a little torn as to how I feel about those blogs. On the one hand they're being honest and open and really letting you see into their heart and mind. On the other hand, are you sure you want anyone just reading such personal things about your life? Those are things I didn't need to know and don't feel like I have the right to know! I don't know. I guess the blog world is a place that some people can really just release a lot of tension, so their deepest feelings come out. I don't have the courage to put that stuff in writing. Or maybe it's that I don't think you all need to know that stuff. Hmm, again I'm torn between the two.

I do, however, dislike it when every comment, post, text, or status is something extremely negative. I hate my life! How could you do this to me? Why are people like this? My friends suck! Poor me. Whine whine. Ok, sometimes crap happens. And, rarely, you sometimes don't even deserve it! But do you have to dwell on every bump and bruise and broadcast it to the whole wide world? At least put a comedic spin on your situation or take some accountability or explain how you're gonna fix it. Anything besides the old, "My life sucks so feel sorry for me" routine. In a nutshell I'm just saying be positive once in awhile. It makes people smile.

Ok, I'd say it's time for an update in Jacob's life, but there's nothing too exciting. I mean, you already know how I'm doing if you know me at all and if you don't know me then you probably don't really care what's going on in my life, so either way I don't need to write anything and this is a huge run-on sentence. I guess there could be a stalker out there just dying for the next driblet about my life they can suck up and devour, but that's highly unlikely. If you are a stalker feel free to email me and I'll tell you all about how I'm getting a hole in my right sock.

I recently got an email from a young woman I knew in Barbacena. She informed me that she had left the church. I served as a Mormon missionary in Brazil for two years. The church was my life and she was a good, faithful member who just wanted to do what's right, so I was devastated when I heard she had stopped attending. I asked her about it and she told me a few things. One, some gangster type people got baptized in the branch there and were using the church as a headquarters for trafficking drugs. The Branch President himself was excommunicated for trafficking drugs with the tithing money. Two, a coup had taken place where members were trying to oust the new Branch President. Somehow they must have missed the memo that you don't get paid for serving in the church and you actually are supposed to serve the people you work with. There were factions vying for positions. Three, this drove the gospel right out of the church. There was no love and harmony. Just pride and resentment. So my dear friend pulled away. Was she wrong to do it? I can't even say. I told her the gospel is perfect. It's true and it'll lead us back to God. But how could I tell her to go back to church when things are like that. It was no longer The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I don't know. Hopefully she'll be alright.

Oh hey, Season 7 of 24 started up. I recommend watching it. Sure, Season 6 was kind of a disappointment. And yeah, it's hard to believe how every single government agency has a highly placed traitor. And it's amazing how people always manage to knock the gun out of the other person's hand so they can have a fistfight. But you know, Jack Bauer is the coolest man alive and I've seen all six seasons and I'm gonna watch this one too! I don't watch much tv. I'm still planning on one day watching that Lost show people are all obsessed with. But I watch 24.

K, this blog had everything you could ask for. I talked about other blogs. I talked about Mormons. And I talked about 24. What more could anyone want?

I Have a Girlfriend

2008-12-15T03:43:00.001-08:00

Jacob Romney has a girlfriend. Who woulda thought? It's been years since I had a real one. Oh, I've had many almosts and maybes, but a legitimate girlfriend? No, not for a long time. I got real sick first dates. I couldn't go on another. They cost money and they have to be one of just a few activities here in Provo. Not much to choose from. I suck at group dates because I don't talk when there's a loudmouth who has to command the attention of the entire group. I decided I had to find someone I already knew who I could date by skipping the first step. How did it happen? Well, it was exceedingly difficult. My girlfriend's name is Julie. She's about 5'2", 114 lbs, dark hair, light skin, beautiful, smart, fun, happy, and extremely shy and awkward when meeting new people. That last part is what made it difficult. She is my ex-girlfriend's ex-roommate. That was also a major complication. I met Julie and thought she was a cute girl. As I saw more of her I thought she'd be fun to date. But I couldn't because of the huge mess with her roommate.
Many of you know the story of Angela, so I won't bore you with the details. Suffice it to say, Julie saw me as Angela's ex and that was it. Finally Angela moved out and I asked Julie out way back in January. We had a fun time, but Julie wasn't in the least bit interested. Calls went unanswered. Texts were answered very briefly. I moved away at the end of February and gave up on Julie. Months later I came to Provo to visit and saw Julie online on facebook, so I invited myself to Julie's home. She told me no way. I said I was coming in a few minutes whether she liked it or not. I said I'd only be there for a few minutes. She caved and said to come in 15 minutes. The poor dear was sick and somehow I ended up staying for about ten hours.
I'd like to say we hit it off then and there, but that's not the case. I knew I was interested, but she still saw me only as Angela's ex boyfriend. Not as her friend and definitely not as a potential boyfriend. So I put a plan into action. I knew that first I had to get Julie to see me as her friend, so I never would mention Angela in front of her. If Julie brought her up I'd steer the conversation away from that dangerous topic. I started dropping by when I was in Provo and then more often when I moved back. She'd never invite me and she'd say no if I asked if she wanted to do something or if I could drop by. So I'd tell her I was dropping by and wouldn't give her any say in the matter. I'd try not to stay too long. I didn't want to become a nuisance.
This was a very delicate matter. I knew Julie's personality because I'd known her for a long time, so I knew she needed to be in a comfortable environment so she could be herself and start to feel comfortable around me. That meant always spending time with her in her apartment with her roommates. Familiar surroundings, friends, ahhh. She felt good and could act normal, so she started to feel comfortable around me. She finally started to see me as her friend, not someone's ex. Step 1 complete.
K, she saw me as a friend, but not a great friend and still not a prospect. I started working on getting her comfortable with me physically. Bit by bit. It had to be done carefully. If she knew I was interested everything was blown. So I'd just sit next to her. Not too close, but close enough. When I'd talk I'd sometimes just lightly touch her arm or leg. I learned this from a book where they talked about training horses. You get them accustomed to your touch little by little until you can finally put the bridle on them. Same basic principle. I turned it into a joke that the only way she could get me to leave was to give me a hug at the door. Stupid, but it was working. She wouldn't shy away after awhile and i could tell I was making headway. Step 2 complete.
Now I was stuck with something I didn't know how to do. I needed her to like me. Part of that was out of my control. Like my personality and mannerisms. Nothing to do about that. But I could do some things. She had to see me often and hear from me often. Not too often or she'd run away. Often enough that I was on her mind, but not often enough that I was always there. It was a delicate balance. I had to judge her reactions to things I'd say or do and then adjust my communication accordingly. Finally she started texting me first. She'd talk to me and it wasn't hard to get her to let me come over. It just took a slight suggestion. I could tell she really enjoyed our time together. Step 3 complete.
I did something next that I didn't mean to do, but it came up in conversation. I told her I was interested. I told her what I'd been doing. This could have destroyed everything. Luckily, she was interested at this point, so instead of being creepy it was cute and instead of being scared she was flattered. I could tell everything was ok when she invited me over for the first time. I started planning activities for us to do. They could be called dates, but I didn't call them that. A failed attempt to go to the hot springs resulted in my arrest, but luckily she was impressed with how I handled the situation and things were good. Finally, we cuddled and started spending time together every day. Step 4 complete. Mission accomplished. After ten or so months after I first took her out the girl was mine.
Oh, it took a little before it became "official" or whatever, but it was pretty much a done deal from that point on. So far she's met quite a few of my friends and family and I've met a bunch of her friends as well. It's been really good. Everyone seems to like her. So here's a few words of advice on how to deal with this:
1) Don't give me crap about spending too much time with her. She's my girlfriend. I like spending time with her so get off my back!
2) When you're with us, don't spend your time trying to make me look bad. It's not funny and it's really annoying.
3) Don't insult her. She's a sweet, wonderful girl. Be nice.
4) Marriage jokes are quite possibly the worst possible thing you can do. We've been dating a short time. Those jokes get ignored at best, can make things awkward normally, and at worst can cause a break-up. I can make those jokes and she can make them. No one else.
5) If marriage jokes are inappropriate then pushing me to get married is ridiculous. We've been dating a short time and I'm not thinking quite that far ahead. I'll get there when I'm good and ready. Don't suggest it to her and don't push me. Ever.
6) Be supportive. Your opinion won't change what I think of her, but it sure is easier on a relationship when you know your friends and family support what you're doing. People have openly disapproved of past girlfriends and it didn't do anybody any good.
7) If you've got an opinion about us and it's not good wait to tell me till she's gone. This seems obvious, but some people are dense.
8) Tell her good things about me when I'm not around. Can't hurt.
These were in no particular order. It's just the order I thought of them. Unfortunately, Julie is leaving for Pennsylvania on Tuesday. She'll be gone for three weeks. Don't try and set me up this Christmas Break. She certainly wouldn't appreciate it. She's told me numerous times that I can't have any other women whether she's in town or not.
Well, that's my girlfriend story. And my terms for being my friend while I'm dating her. Anyway, that's two new posts. Sorry if they suck, but that's what's been on my mind lately, so that's what you get to read about.

Money

2008-12-15T02:57:00.000-08:00

I have just been informed that I haven't written a new post in over two weeks. This is tragic for many reasons. I'm just too good at this to not write in that long. It's four am. I should be sleeping. Or studying. Again. At least I took a shower. I'm nice and clean. Anyway, as many of you know I recently became utterly and completely broke. I wondered how this could have happened because I worked hard this summer and made over ten thousand dollars. I figured it would get me through. Then I added it up and decided that it's way too expensive to live. I splurged for the first time ever and bought myself a desktop and a laptop in March. Then I had to keep paying for an apartment in Provo due to a dirty liar and cheat that I trusted. Somehow he sleeps well at night. Then there were several other expenses. I'll list them:

Computer: 2000
Tuition: 2000
Summer Rent (Cost covered by me): 800
Arrest: 837
Car Costs: 500
Deposit for Apartment: 200
Rent: 1570
Utilities: 200
Tithing: 1000
Books: 200
Money Lent out: 800
Food (March-December): Unknown
Miscellaneous: Unknown

I have no idea how much food I bought, but I'm sure it was less than the average person since I often forget to eat. Miscellaneous is probably spelled wrong and it covers anything not in the list that maybe I forgot about like buying soap or going out with friends. I estimated on the low end for most of these things. Not including the unknowns (which include major essentials) I ended up with $10107 dollars. Huh, that's where all my money went. I think some of the people around here don't understand the effort involved. In Provo if you want a job you'll get something around 8 dollars an hour. If you're lucky. At my previous employment I was earning somewhere around 9. Do you know how many hours it would take to make $10000? Let's do that math too after taking taxes out which at that income for a single person is around 23 percent. You'd have to make $13,000 to get $10,010 at that rate. That's 1,444.44 hours or 36.11 full time weeks. Wow! What's a young college student to do in Provo? There are several solutions. Sell plasma. Full time job year round. Scholarships, grants, loans. Get rich quick summer scheme. Move away for the summer and try to make a decent buck.
Then you've got your rich kids who have no concept of money and don't understand what you're going through. Their parents pay for everything. Their job is a hobby. They use YOUR STUFF! Eat YOUR FOOD! And yet they complain about not having everything they want and school being tough etc. They live in a little fantasy world. I've had people insult my car. I've had girls complain that I didn't take them to nice places. I've had friends get upset when i won't go places with them. I've had everyone think I'm being a killjoy for not going out to eat every other night. Guess what. These things take money! And money is in short supply around here. So what will I do? Well, I tried the summer thing and I'm broke. I've screwed up enough grades that scholarship is out. Loans are out for a complicated reason. Grants, I tried. Nope. Work year round? Did it for years but in the end it nearly killed me. Whine some more? Maybe a little. Ask a rich friend for money? Hmm, I blew my chance for that too. She might have given me some had I asked the right way or promised the right thing. Oh well, I'll figure it out.
How much of my situation is my fault? Quite a bit actually. I won't deny it. I screwed up with school which cost me scholarships and loans. I took some time off to play in the summer. Bad idea. I made a lot of money, but not enough. I didn't plan ahead well enough either. I should have gotten at least a parttime job when i came back to Provo. Friends offered, but I thought I was fine. I should have at the very least gotten straight A's this semester, but a few distractions at critical times cost me some key tests and then I blew that too. Laziness might have played a role as well. So do I deserve help? Do I deserve for someone to step in and save me from the mess I made? Well, if I was a Democrat who supported Obama I'd say yes! Save me from the hole I dug for myself! But I'm not. I have this weird idea that people should be held responsible for their actions. So I'll try and get myself out of this. It should be fun. So keep an eye on me for the next few months. Pull up a chair and make some popcorn. This oughta be at the least entertaining.

Who Thought it?

2008-11-29T00:57:00.000-08:00

I was reading Miles' blog about people eating animals and I just thought of something. Who was the first person to think of eating a cow? I mean, look at those creatures. They're filthy, dumb, disgusting animals. Who thought, "I wonder if that disease ridden parasite's muscles taste good? I think I'm gonna kill it and find out." That's sick and twisted. Now we know that it does indeed taste good, but the first guy to give it a shot? There had to be something wrong with him. The same goes for the first person to eat an egg. It popped out of a chicken's behind! Where did someone get the idea to crack it open and eat the unborn animal? Or a raw oyster? Or milk from a cow. Wow.
Those people can maybe be understood by hunger. Hungry people do desperate things. But there are a few other ideas that blow my mind. Smoking. Where did that come from? Why would anyone consider finding some weed, rolling it up, lighting it on fire, and sticking it in your mouth? That's so counter intuitive. Normally people try to keep hazardous substances away from their mouths. There are several other things, like drinking coffee and beer that I just don't understand how they got started. And I don't understand how anyone can stomach beer long enough to acquire a taste for it and get drunk. I had a non alcoholic beer once and it was nasty.
Some people just don't think like the rest of us. Some of these odd inventions are great. Things like chocolate with peanut butter and milk on cereal. These were odd ideas, but turned out great. Then we've got the sad things that we have to put up with in life like olives on food and meth. These people make our world an interesting place.

Robbed!

2008-11-25T09:16:00.001-08:00

Stephen and I went to Carl's Jr the other day. They have these new 99 cent chicken sandwiches that are pretty good. Anyway, we were sitting there in the drive through line and it wasn't moving at all. We didn't know why until we realized the Carl's Jr was being robbed. He cleaned out the cash registers and then came out to the stalled drive through line. We couldn't go anywhere. We were bumper to bumper. It was almost comical. He just walked down the line of cars tapping on the window of each car with his gun and robbing each person of the little cash they had to pay for their food with. By the time he got to us we had it all ready and just forked it on over. After cleaning out both the restaurant and all the cars he took off. We lost our two dollars for our sandwiches, but I'm sure it could have been worse. Ok, that didn't really happen, but we thought it would have been pretty funny if it did.

Rebekah

2008-11-18T19:14:00.001-08:00

I don't often write two posts in the same week, much less in the same day, but something came to my attention just now and my last post was rather short and was merely an attempt to get people to leave comments on my posts so that I feel loved. Anyway, many of you know my older sister Rebekah. Beautiful, talented, smart, headstrong. These are all accurate descriptions of Rebekah. She has a talent that I've never understood and never been able to duplicate. Rebekah will get an idea and decide it needs to happen. She'll tell everyone it's happening. And, sure enough! It happens! Every time! I don't know of any failures. When she lived in King Henry she'd decide it was time for volleyball or football or soccer and next thing you knew there were 40 people outside playing. She decided to go to college and she graduated, so she decided to go on a mission and got to go to Italy, and then decided to be a lawyer and graduated law school. On a whim. Now she doesn't really like being a lawyer, so who knows what's in store for Rebekah. Maybe med school? The presidency?
But it's not just things like this. Oh no. She decided to have a big dinner commemorating her passing the bar exam. So she tells everyone to go to such and such place at such and such a time. And you know what? Everybody came! Her self-congratulatory dinner came about. This week she has decided is her birthday week. One day isn't quite good enough for Rebekah. This is her week with perhaps an honorable mention thrown in for her twin brother. She wants several things to happen and she just might get away with it all. I will be watching from the shadows as it all unfolds.
Why can I not do this? I have no idea. I tried it this week. I told everyone that we were going to the hot springs on Saturday night. I thought for awhile that it might work. Lots of people said they'd come, but one after another bailed until there were five who set out. Two turned back around Spanish Fork and then there were only three of us. We failed to arrive at the hot springs due to my very unfortunate arrest. That was perhaps the most dismal failure in the history of planned activities. I think I'll leave it all to Rebekah from now on. Rebekah, can you plan a trip to the hot springs?

Comments

2008-11-18T14:14:00.001-08:00

I'm sitting at home waiting for a ride to campus because my car won't start. I was looking at blogs. Maybe you people don't understand, but we who write the blogs are encouraged by the comments we receive. It doesn't have to be a well thought out, uplifting, funny, or profound comment. We just like to know people are reading our blogs! Jared's blog was funny, but he only wrote two posts. Miles' blog is always great, but you can tell he gets frustrated with the lack of comments. After I make a post I check incessantly over the next few days to see if I've gotten any new comments. It's so distressing to get only a couple comments for a post. I know my posts aren't all fantastic, but I need to know that at least SOMEONE is reading them. I know that someday I'll receive 0 comments on one of my posts. On that day, my blog will die.

I got arrested

2008-11-16T15:06:00.000-08:00

I'm getting tired of explaining what happened, so here's the story:
Last night started out like many other nights. I was with some people and we were going to do something fun. In this case we were going to the hot springs. It's an hour and a half drive, so I was going about 10 over the speed limit when I got pulled over. It was gonna be a big group, but quite a few people bailed out. There were only three of us at this point because the car following us decided not to come anymore and they turned around. The cop came up to the window and collected my information. I've been through this procedure a number of times, so when he asked me to get out of the car I was a bit surprised. He told me to turn around and put my hands behind my back. He handcuffed me and told me I was under arrest for two outstanding warrants and for driving with a suspended license. Again, I was very surprised. He put me in the back of his car, which has no leg room whatsoever by the way, and asked which girl I wanted to drive my car. I told him Julie who was in the passenger seat. Unfortunately, neither girl in the car knew how do drive a stick. I personally think that is a skill that all people should have and my point has just been proved. Jessica called her brother to come get them and the cop and I drove away. I asked him if they were gonna be ok out there deserted on a road in the middle of nowhere at night, but he didn't seem concerned and there was nothing I could do about it.
So the first warrant was for expired registration on my car. I got that ticket in Duschene a little ways outside of Roosevelt where I used to live. I remember getting the ticket and I remember getting my registration done and calling and paying and them telling me it was all good. The Provo one is a mystery since I haven't been pulled over here in a year or so, but apparently just recently had a warrant issued for a taillight violation. Last year I remember getting that ticket and fixing my taillight and going to the Provo police department and paying up and showing them my car, so I don't know what the deal is with the new warrant.
Anyway, they took everything from my pockets and placed me in a stone room for an hour or so. Then they took me to the "Dress" room, took all my clothes, and put me in those orange clothes prisoners wear. I talked to mom on the phone and then they booked me. Mug shot, fingerprints, all that. Then I was placed in a holding cell for the night. Around 3 in the morning Stephen showed up with 837 dollars that mom took out of my bank account to bail me out.

Meandering Thoughts

2008-11-06T01:07:00.000-08:00

It's 2 AM and I have a test in the morning. I'm not prepared. I should be studying or sleeping or doing just about anything else. Instead I'm sitting here with my thoughts jumping from one topic to another. I looked at pictures of my little niece. She's such a cutie. I read all the blogs on our recent election. I thought about people in general. I thought about Obama's policies. I understand why people voted for him, but I just can't agree with it. Did the common Democrat think of the implications of these miracle policies?
I'm not gonna get into the nitty gritty details of all these policies. I did come to a conclusion about people though. I used to think that people as a whole are pretty stupid. That may or may not be correct, but I'm pretty sure people are lazy and cowardly. They run from responsibility. And that's what made Obama so appealing. "No matter what I do I'm taken care of." That's it in a nutshell. I can destroy my body and it doesn't matter because we're getting government health care. Did I think that I'm paying taxes and so are the healthy people? Did I think that those taxes are paying for my health care? Did I think that I am using the hard earned money of the healthy people to pay for my irresponsible, unhealthy behavior? No, I just heard "Do what you want, it doesn't matter, because regardless of what you've done you get the same treatment."
Is that fair? No, that's not fair. Do I care? No, because the weight has been taken from my shoulders. Instead of being granted health plans and educational benefits granted on merit I'm getting them merely for the fact that I exist. In essence, the harder you work and the better you do the more you help sustain the ever-growing population of irresponsible Americans. And it's just gonna get worse. Taxes have to go up and they'll hit the hard-working Americans hardest because that's what the mass of irresponsible lazy people want. They see the rich guy and think, "Why does he have so much more than me? It isn't fair! Take it from him!" Now I admit that some people don't deserve their wealth and they waste it. Paris Hilton is a prime example. But most rich people are rich because they worked themselves to death to get there. And now they'll be penalized for success. "Oh, you did great! You have a ton of money! Let me redistribute that now. This man is extremely obese and his lungs are failing from a lifetime of smoking and eating fast food. Not to mention he dropped out of high school and his welfare check just can't sustain him anymore. So let me take this from you and give it to him."
That's what it's come to. The people have discovered that they can vote themselves money and vote themselves free of responsibility. Will we wake up before it's too late? I don't know. But hey, I don't have a job right now. I'm in debt and going to school. I couldn't find that Boardwalk piece in the McDonald's Monopoly game. Maybe I'll get something out of this...
I wrote this very late and it's not well put together. As I said in the title, my thoughts were wandering and I just typed them out. But that's what a blog is for I guess.

Intramural Sports

2008-10-29T21:43:00.000-07:00

Several of you are avid readers of my brother Miles' blog. If you are not I encourage you to do so. His blogs are better than mine. A link can be found on the side of this page. He once mentioned that we have become a nation of spectators. I believe he is correct. How many of us still play sports on a regular basis? How many of us go outside just to enjoy being outside? During the fall semester my lifeblood is intramural sports. My life is centered around my games. They make me feel so alive! Nothing can compare with the perfect tackle or the perfect goal.
I don't spend much time outside anymore. I have class and I have video games to keep me inside. I'll go outside, but I'll get bored because I'm by myself and I'll wander back inside. I don't feel healthy spending so much time indoors. I get hungry easier, I get sick easier, I get frustrated with class and life easier, and I do more poorly at everything when I spend so much time inside. I get irritable and less social. I'm already weak at social interactions, so that really doesn't help.
After I play a game of football or soccer I feel tired, yet rejuvenated. As if I can take on the world and everything is ok with life. I can concentrate on my schooling better, I'm friendlier, and I'm all around happier. I've started to wonder. Is this what's wrong with our society in general. Are we all spending so much time inside that we're making ourselves depressed and lethargic? Is it so hard to go outside and feel the wind on our faces? It feels good to run! It feels good to sweat. And my personal opinion is that I'm better looking just after playing a game. But intramural season will soon be over and there'll be no more games. No more sports. Just lots of snow and Halo 3. We're in for a bleak winter.

Steak 'n Shake vs. In-N-Out

2008-10-24T15:28:00.000-07:00

Ever since I first moved to Provo I've heard all these Californians talking about how great In-N-Out burger is. The say it's fantastic and there's never been a better fast food place out there. They drive to California or Nevada just so they can get In-N-Out. They even have people traveling to California bring them back some In-N-Out even though it will obviously be cold and nasty by the time they get back.
I thought this must be some good stuff. I went to California for my brother's wedding and we stopped at In-N-Out. I was deeply disappointed. They had very few choices. Their burgers were just plain old burgers and their fries were plain old fries. There was nothing in the least bit exceptional about that place. It was also very much overpriced. And yes, I've heard of their secret menu. I even looked it up online. Big fricken deal. In-N-Out was nothing special. Just an overrated burger place. Knowing Californians as well as I do I just assume they're trying to inflate their own importance.
Every time someone brings up In-N-Out I ask them if they've heard of Steak 'n Shake. Most of them have not. Steak 'n Shake is a burger place in the Midwest. You see a Steak 'n Shake on every corner. Now I've eaten at Steak 'n Shake many times. The menu is diverse. You can get Steakburgers, not hamburgers, but steakburgers. They're made with pure steak. You can get sandwiches, grilled cheese, salads, chicken, chili, shakes, etc. The food is good. It's fast. It is a mixture between a fast food restaurant and a nice sit down place. I think it's the best of both worlds. The grill is out where people can see it and the grill men are trained until flipping burgers is almost an art form. I worked at Steak n' Shake for a short time and people would sit at the counter and watch me for over an hour. I stuck a cup on the counter and wrote Grill Man Tips on the side and it got filled up. I still like eating there after having worked there. See how many people can say that about food! The fries are different and they're amazing.
Basically, Steak 'n Shake proved to be superior to In-N-Out in every way possible. There is no contest. So what is the big deal with In-N-Out? That's one of those impossible questions like why do people care about Paris Hilton or how are there so many Democrats when their policies are so obviously ridiculous? It all comes down to the fact that people are stupid, but that is a subject for another day. I think both an In-N-Out and a Steak 'n Shake should be placed in Provo and people should be allowed to choose. I have full confidence that Steak 'n Shake would win by a landslide.

Discomfort is an Amazing Thing

2008-10-06T14:24:00.000-07:00

Today I was in the men's restroom and thought of something that I'm quite certain would make most people uncomfortable. I'm not a psychology or sociology major, but I do understand people to an extent. I've wondered about the meaning of the word normal many times throughout my life and I've created a definition. Normal is a person's expectation in any given circumstance as to how any other person will act or react to the situation. Those who act as expected are normal and therefore do not cause any discomfort to the observer. Any time someone acts outside of the expected behavior they create a potential for a "scene".
I am one of those people who is rarely categorized as normal. I have a malfunctioning brain. It's very difficult for me to feel awkward or uncomfortable. As such, I often do things that would embarrass another individual because they're not normal activities. In the restroom I almost began to sing the song "Faith" by Limp Bizkit. The lyrics are as follows:
Well I guess it would be nice,
if I could touch your body.
I know not everybody
has got a body like me.
But I gotta think twice,
before I give my heart away.
And I know all the games you play,
cause I play them too.
I thought about it and realized that this would be abnormal behavior for several reasons.
1) Most people do not speak or sing while they are in a public restroom full of strangers. It is a room where you enter and leave as quickly as possible.
2) There is already great potential for feeling uncomfortable as a region of your body that is usually covered by several layers of protective clothing is exposed to the elements.
3) The first line would definitely grab attention as I would be singing about touching the body of an unspecified individual. Being exposed and having me sing that line next to them might make them think that I want to touch them especially if said line is accompanied with a smile and wink. People in our society are not accustomed to being touched by strangers. We have a large personal bubble.
4) There has been much media attention given to homosexuality. Since the room is full of men the thought would most likely occur that I am, in layman's term, a fag.
With these four reasons playing off each other it is most likely that the common, "normal", individual will begin to feel uncomfortable with my behavior. I would be stepping too far outside the expected behavior to not draw attention. The result could be something small, like people moving away from me and giving me odd looks. However, a "scene" could result in the which case a person might ask me to shutup or call me gay or, in an extreme event, take a swing at me. The rare individual would find my behavior humorous.
Having considered the possibilites, I used common sense and did not sing that song in the public restroom. I did find the thought amusing and so probably drew some attention by chuckling to myself as I made use of the facilities. I could go on and on about the subject of discomfort, but unfortunately I have to attend class in a few minutes.

Why do People Blog?

2008-10-06T14:12:00.000-07:00

I've wondered for quite some time why people find it necessary to create a blog. I'm sure there are lots of different reasons for blogging. Some people are really rather pathetic and it is a desperate cry for attention. They put all sorts of ridiculous things on their page in an effort to get more readers. Having done so, they can pretend that every hit on their page is a new friend. The prospect of having these friends, even though as far as the subject is concerned these friends are imaginary, makes the thought of suicide less appealing. Because after all, who will maintain the blog page once they are gone? I compare these pitiful creatures with those who constantly update their facebook status with depressing comments like "So-and-so just had a horrible day." I hate to break it to you, but nobody cares about your day to day activities. We don't really want to know how you're doing. Like when I see someone and say how are you? I don't really want to know how you are. That's not an invitation to dump all your emotions on me. It's a formality. You say fine regardless of how you're doing and we can then continue with the conversation. These people are, thankfully, in the minority.
Other people create blogs because they have far too much time on their hands. There isn't much to say about them as I don't read their blogs since they always lack interesting material. Some people see this is a way to keep tabs on their family members. This is an acceptable reason for a blog. When I am reminded to do so I check the blogs of my relations. They're funny people and they have interesting stories to tell and intelligent topics to discuss. Some people are highly intelligent and write a blog because they can't keep their fantastic thoughts and ideas bottled up in their brain. I find it hard to understand these blogs. Then, the final reason. I made a blog because I've been pestered to the breaking point about making a blog. Fine, if you want me to write stuff every now and then, here it is.